There are two words that new parents should live by: EASY and SLOW.

Take them literally and remember what they stand for, says Tracy Hogg, author of the new parenting book, "Secrets of the Baby Whisperer" (Ballantine, $22).

EASY is short for "eating," "activity," "sleeping" and "you," the guidelines of a structured yet livable routine.

SLOW is "stop," "listen" and "observe," so moms and dads can figure out "what’s up?" It’s a technique that enables parents to decipher what their baby is saying and needs, explains Hogg, a nurse, lactation educator and newborn consultant.

Her clients gave her the name "baby whisperer" because of her ability to calm and soothe babies by respecting, learning, listening and communicating with them.

"In the first couple of weeks, his personality starts to emerge straight away, and it stays that way," says Hogg. "You can’t fit a baby into a personality he’s not. You have to get to know them for who they are."

Hogg knows this from experience. She has two girls of her own, Sophie, 15, and Sara, 18, and has cared for infants for the past 24 years.

Her approach to parenting is a commonsense model passed on from generation to generation. Hogg credits her own grandmother with influencing both her childhood and mothering skills, and she encourages parents to take advice from their own relatives.

Parents did just fine before the age of "infotainment" and the Internet, Hogg says.

And, what babies want most is structure. They like predictability, Hogg explains, and they express confusion by crying.

"Stability grows out of a good foundation."

The most common fear of parents is that they will unwittingly harm the baby, which is unlikely; and the most common frustration is not knowing what the baby wants, which can be remedied by learning what the different cries mean.

Hogg was once called to the home of a worried mother who couldn’t figure out why her baby slept soundly in the bassinet but would cry at the top of her lungs when in the crib.

The mother insisted something was either wrong with the baby, the crib or how the mother was placing her in it, Hogg says. The problem was the crib was under an air vent and the baby was cold.

Hoggs offers these basic baby guidelines:

For expecting parents: Take an infant preparation class, not just Lamaze or Bradley breathing classes.

For parents of newborns: Not everything will be perfect. Get comfortable with your baby - and remember the first six months don’t last forever.

For parents of 1-year-olds: Take your structure with you wherever you go to help maintain your baby’s routine.

And the most important thing for a mother (or father) to do is to trust their instincts.

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