Wedding Diary
After much debate, couple's tuxedo nightmare finally ends

Wedding Diary is a column by Nu'uanu residents Connie Soga, 30, and Bret Moore, 27. The periodic column is tracking the couple's progress as they near their Nov. 3 wedding, with approximately 300 guests, at the Sheraton Waikiki.

By Connie Soga and Brett Moon

Connie Soga and Bret Moore dropped the Army, Navy, civilian-suit mix Moore once considered for his groomsmen, and have opted instead to dress everyone in black tuxedos for their Nov. 3 wedding. Gregory Yamamoto The Honolulu Advertiser

Finds and flops: Having Bret pick out his tuxedo was a nightmare! Thankfully, the people at the store were extremely helpful. Bret had these preconceived ideas from looking at catalogs and magazines. And his choices changed a lot over the months!

At first he was going to wear his military formal uniform and let the three military guys in our lineup wear their dress uniforms. Two are Army, one is Navy, and the other two groomsmen, his brothers, would be in tuxes. I really had to fight with Bret to change his mind about that parade of outfits and colors.

Then at the tux store, Bret said he wanted tails, then a double breasted jacket — he even joked about wearing a zoot suit because they actually had one (complete with a swinging gold chain!). I almost had my wedding meltdown right there. We were there over an hour. But in the end, great selections were made: Bret is going with black tuxes for everybody. He will wear one style, and the groomsmen will wear a complementary style.

So far, I'm very happy with the wedding professionals we have hired. Most of them don't have a big company full of employees and they don't do a lot of commercial advertising. They rely heavily on word of mouth and do the work themselves, and I get a really personal feeling from them.

Progress: This month we put down the deposit for our reception DJ, Reggie Cunningham of 3D Universe. We also signed our contract and put down the deposit with Elegant Creations for our slide show and video coverage.

My maid of honor and I have started looking at places to hold the bridesmaid luncheon and bridal shower. This month I also selected what our wedding favors will be, but I want that to be a surprise for our guests, so I won't reveal it here.

We are still looking for an emcee — very hard to find. And I am trying to update the addresses of our friends and family members for our invitations. I've also got our mothers looking for baby and childhood pictures of Bret and me for our slide show. Bret and I grew up with '70s clothing and '80s hairdos, so it should be pretty funny to see what our parents have dug up.

Lessons learned: All the research into getting our wedding things at the best prices paid off.

The first place I saw my wedding gown was at a bridal salon, where it was $1,000. After two weeks of shopping around, I found it somewhere else for less than $600. Our invitations and response cards would have been $400-$500, but I got a 20-percent-off coupon at a bridal show. Bret got two free tuxedo rentals with a "rent 5, get one free" plan and saved more than $200. We're getting a free ice sculpture at our reception with a coupon I found. Our videographer has allowed us to create and buy a custom package that was less expensive than a standard package and eliminated things we didn't want.

All together, we've saved about $4,000. Whether you look at that as $4,000 saved or $4,000 to spend on other things for the wedding, it's well worth the effort.

Bret

Progress: This month was my most productive yet. But as Connie said, getting my tux was a nightmare. I am a personal trainer, and building muscle is a goal of mine. This usually means getting bigger clothes. We must have gone through about 15 tux jackets before we settled on one. The specialist who helped us at Tuxedo Junction, Verliza Florendo, was amazing: She was very professional and took time to listen to what I wanted.

I've made more payments toward our photographer, videographer, tuxedos and cake artist. I still have to secure the groomsmen's gifts and the site for the rehearsal dinner. Connie and I are starting to develop an itinerary for the families and bridal party. Our cake artist, Leigh Heggie at Tiers of Joy, is making some samples for us, so I'm looking forward to eating them.

Still on my list: the final payments on our photographer, the videographer and the tuxes. The lei will be purchased sometime during the week of the wedding. I would like to have our payments all made by the end of August.

We are going to take our honeymoon next year instead of right after the wedding. Our families will still be here the week after the wedding. I can't see us saying, "Thanks for coming to our wedding. Bye! We're going on our honeymoon now!". So we're going to stay with them the week after the wedding and relax. When we do go on our honeymoon next year, we want to go to California and do the Disneyland/Sea World/San Diego Zoo trip.

Finds and flops: Tuxedo Junction has these cards that you can mail to the men in your wedding party, and they take it to the nearest tux shop where they live to get their measurements done. Afterwards, they send the card back to Tuxedo Junction, and their tuxes are ready when they come in for the wedding. This is very helpful because half of the members of our party live on the Mainland, and they are coming in a few days before the wedding.

Lessons learned: You have to go into your tuxedo fitting with an open mind. If you have your mind set on a certain style, you better be prepared for a second choice. What I walked into the store looking for and what we ended up getting was totally different.