Editor's note: Rod Ohira's People debuts today and will appear every Monday in The Honolulu Advertiser.

By Rod Ohira
Advertiser Staff Writer

On a worn-out path between work and home strewn with empty-time holes that the lonely can never fill, life sometimes takes a U-turn as it did for Zena Fernandes and William "Sonny" Kaehu.

William "Sonny" Kaehu and Zena Fernandez Kaehu were friends long before their June 2 wedding.

Kaehu, 62, was one of her older brother Edgar's best friends. Together with retired Honolulu police sergeant Cliff Kaneaiakala, they shared a passion for riding Harley-Davidson motorcycles. "They were always riding their bikes and I'd scold them for not going to church," Fernandes recalled. "They were older than me but I was like their big sister."

Edgar, an operations supervisor for Hawaii Stevedores, died in a dockside accident in May 1999.

His wife, Miriam, had been killed four years earlier in a car crash. Fernandes, already living with her brother and caring for his two daughters, was suddenly alone.

Her friendship with Kaehu, strengthened by the tragedy, blossomed into a loving relationship and ultimately marriage on June 2. It is her first marriage and the second for Kaehu, whose wife of 41 years died about five years ago.

"I believe this is a gift from Edgar," Fernandes said.

In the months after his friend's death, Kaehu often called on Fernandes to see how she was doing. "I needed someone to talk to, and he filled a void by providing a male figure in our lives," Fernandes said. "He really helped to ease the depression."

Kaehu attended a karaoke birthday party for Fernandes July 3 of last year and even sang, which surprised Fernandes. It led to a more social relationship as they went out to Ono Hawaiian Foods in Kapahulu later that month.

"I guess this was our first real date," Fernandes said. "Afterward, we went to Hawai'i Kai Zippy's and talked all night long. I felt so comfortable because we were already friends. We could just be ourselves, nothing fufu."

It wasn't until last Christmas, though, when Kaehu went to San Jose, Calif., to spend three weeks with his sister, that the couple discovered how serious their relationship had become.

"She was nice but I didn't think how much she meant to me until then," said Kaehu, who asked Fernandes to move in with him when he returned to Hawai'i. "Instead of playing cat and mouse, she said it's better to make it legal. And she said her brother would like it that way, too."

The months leading up to the marriage turned out to be an eye-opening period of adjustment for two people set in their ways.

It started in the bathroom.

"I'd put out two sets of bath towels, his and mine, and he uses my wash towel and dries himself with my bath towel," Fernandes said. "It took a lot for me to stay calm. I asked him why he used my towel and his logic was, 'why dirty another one.' "

With three women in the Kailua home — Fernandes and her nieces, 21-year-old Tracy and 17-year-old Chelsea — the toilet seat became an issue with Kaehu.

"He'd leave it up and always tell us, 'you folks don't put it up when you're finished,' " she said with a smile. "He's starting to conform with the towels but we're still waiting on the seat."

The couple are enjoying married life.

"We have companionship and love each other," Kaehu said. "Because we're older, I think we know how to get along better."

Fernandes, meanwhile, has made a difficult adjustment.

"I've had to change my priorities because my husband comes first now," she said. "Sonny and I have our own values and standards, and the girls don't always comply. I've been caught in the middle a few times. We both love the girls ... we'll always be there for them, but the time has come for us to lead our own lives."

Rod Ohira writes about the people who make Hawai'i special. He can be reached by phone at 535-8181 or by e-mail at rohira@honoluluadvertiser.com.