Posted on: Friday, June 1, 2001

Movie Scene
There's no need to dog 'The Animal'

By Susan Wloszczyna
USA TODAY

"The Animal" stoops to bathroom humor, but stays out of the gutter. Stars: Rob Schneider, Colleen Haskell, John C. McGinley Director: Luke Greenfield Distributor: Columbia Rating: PG-13 for some crude and sexual humor. Two and a half stars = Fair+

Let's deal with the big question. Colleen Haskell, the cutie-pie standout from TV's first "Survivor" cast, remains easy on the eyes in her big-screen debut in "The Animal." Otherwise, Meryl Streep can relax.

Back to our regularly scheduled review. The zooey premise of Rob Schneider's comic assault — an underdog survives a terrible accident and develops superhuman powers after his body parts are replaced with animal organs — might lead you to expect a beastly barrage of dumb shenanigans. Certainly, Schneider noisily humping a mailbox like Mr. Ed on Viagra and batting his baleful peepers at a goat in heat to the strains of "Let's Get It On" define base barnyard behavior.

And when characters are called Mange and Fatty, you can be sure you aren't at a Merchant-Ivory film. More like Hanna-Barbera.

But compared with his first star vehicle, "Deuce Bigalow: Male Gigolo," this effort is a baby-step up on the humor food chain. Instead of mean-spirited stupidity or a gush of gross-outs, Schneider, with his cherub curls and scrawny physique, adopts a pussycat persona that engenders goodwill. It's a ploy that mentor Adam Sandler (who's an executive producer) has beaten to near-extinction, but Schneider makes it fresh. Or at least less stale.

Sure, he pees on restaurant chairs to mark his territory. But such monkeyshines aren't his fault. He constantly battles his creature-spawned urges — beaver, dolphin, seal, you name it — and the resulting physical comedy is bound to trigger your laugh instinct.

Schneider starts off as a garage-dwelling loser who aspires to be a cop but lacks the brawn. His main duty at a small-town police station is as an object of ridicule for John C. McGinley's Blutonian bully of a sergeant. When Schneider's car goes off a cliff (stretched to hilarious extremes by novice director Luke Greenfield), his mangled remains are whisked away by a mad doctor who secretly performs surgery.

A dazed Schneider suddenly can race like a cheetah and sniff out drugs like a bloodhound. The zero becomes a hero, impressing both his supervisor (Ed Asner, who gets off a few good doubletakes) and Haskell's sweet animal shelter worker while enraging McGinley. But after a snacked-upon cow is found and a hunter is attacked, the townsfolk stalk Schneider like an angry mob in a werewolf movie.

This may be giving Schneider too much credit, but the lad has found a way to temporarily halt the de-evolution of the silly comedy. "The Animal" may stoop to bathroom gags, but it stays out of the gutter.