Posted on: Monday, December 16, 2002
Santa Rampage mixes holiday cheer, lots of beer
By Ylan Q. Mui
Washington Post
WASHINGTON — There are two problems with the North Pole: It is too cold, and there is no beer.
"Santa likes beer," said the red-suited, black-booted Alex Laham, 32, of Rockville, Md., as he warmed up with a Sam Adams at the Madhatter on M Street NW here last weekend. He spilled some on his hat, which was lying on the table.
Then another Santa, this one dressed all in black, launched into an unprintable rendition of "Santa Claus Is Coming to Town." This was followed by gut-shaking laughter and applause from about two dozen other people dressed as Santa, plus two elves and a reindeer.
The group had taken over the bar. Startled patrons in civvies huddled in corners. Passersby did double-takes at the roomful of red. It was a Santa Rampage. And in the nation's capital and nationwide, it was just heating up.
"Santa needs some sophisticated adult entertainment," one of the Santas said before they stormed a strip club nearby.
During 12 hours two weekends ago, the Santas hit a half-dozen bars, two strip joints and a sex toys shop. They were chased out of an Internet cafe and accosted by cops. One Santa lost his driver's license and his credit cards while barhopping. Another was punched in the face by an angry man.
"We get a critical mass of Santas and anything can happen," said one Santa, a District of Columbia resident who works for a government defense agency and wished to be known only as "Johnny Cash-anta — The Santa in Black."
The scene has played out nationwide every December since 1994 as hundreds of men and women don their gay apparel for Santa Rampage, also known as Santarchy or Santacon. It started in San Francisco with about 35 Santas as one of the many antics of the Cacophony Society, a loosely organized band of pranksters.
Since then, Santas have run amok through the streets of cities from Los Angeles to London. The District rampage, in its fourth year, was one of the first of this season.
In past years, Santas have sung Christmas carols to police in riot gear in Portland. They have marched down Fifth Avenue in New York chanting "Charge it, charge it, charge it" and scaled the Brooklyn Bridge. And most of all, they have gotten drunk.
"The cheaper (the Santa suit), the better because they typically get covered in beer," said Rob Carlson, 23, of Parkville, Md., who paid about $8 for the suit and Christmas lights he wore recently.
The point — if there is one — is to "shake people's ideas of Christmas up a little bit," says John Law, 44, a small-business owner in San Francisco who was one of the three founders of Santa Rampage. It's about "people getting together and taking back the holiday, taking it back from the commercial, corporate control of this imagery."
A noble cause, certainly, but one that can get lost after a couple swigs of the holiday spirits.
"We're not making a stand or anything," said Matthew Dwyer, 24, a bartender who heads Drunken Santas, a New Orleans version of the rampage unaffiliated with the Cacophony Society. "It's just a bunch of idiots in Santa suits."
The rampage began about 2 p.m. on the Mall. They hauled sacks of goodies for people of all ages: from candy canes for wide-eyed children to Trojan Ultra Pleasure condoms for snickering adults. They plastered stickers reading "naughty" or "nice" on startled tourists. Then, as reindeer were in short supply, they mounted the horses on the carousel for a free ride.
But soon they grew weary. So the Santas hit the bars: the Madhatter, the Big Hunt, Cafe Odeon, Common Share, the Pharmacy Bar, Club Heaven and Hell. They dashed in and dashed out, dropping dollars and downing drinks until the twinkle in their eyes glazed over. They crossed taxicab zones and class lines, giving candy to homeless men downtown and leading the upper crust at Cafe Odeon in a rowdy chorus of "Ho, ho, ho!"
By midnight, the local Santas were ruddy and rumpled and fading fast. The group had dwindled to about 15 and the rampage petered out about 2 a.m. They resumed their normal lives the next day — computer engineer, retired professional dominatrix, mother of three — hibernating until the next holiday season.
