DRIVE TIME
Drivers plot ways to beat the cameras

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By Mike Leidemann
Advertiser Staff Writer

These cameras on the road seem to be bringing out the really inventive side in some people. In recent weeks, we've heard about some unbelievable lengths people are going to in their efforts to avoid one of those mailed citations. They've mentioned everything from laser detectors to joining the military.

In the spirit of furthering public discussion of these camera things, we here at Drive Time offer a Top 10 list of ways people are planning to beat the system. We hasten to point out that most of these methods are illegal and/or stupid; still, that doesn't seem to be stopping anyone.

10. Buy one of those plastic covers for license plates. They're said to partially hide the plate numbers, making it impossible for car owners to receive a ticket. They are reportedly flying off the shelves at some automotive stores.

They have two problems, though. One is that officials swear they don't work. The other is that they are illegal. One lady we know with plate covers on her car got stopped by police in downtown Honolulu; they issued her two tickets — one for each plate cover. Total fines: $110.

Then again, if they don't work, why are police worried about them?

9. Incorporate yourself. At least one attorney we know is advising his clients to file simple papers of incorporation and then register all their cars in the company's name, not yours. You'll still have to pay for tickets, but they won't affect your insurance, he says.

8. Get a laser detector. Our photo enforcement program uses laser guns to identify speeders; laser detectors are said to alert you to their presence in time to slow down. Good ones are expensive, $300 and up; the cheaper ones don't always work so well.

7. Move to England. A British entrepreneur is marketing a system that uses Global Positioning Devices to identify every known speed trap in the country and send a beeping, flashing warning direct to your dashboard every time you approach one. It costs about $700 a year — roughly the same as about two dozen speeding tickets in Hawai'i.

6. Take off your front license plate. The theory is that if there's no license plate to take a picture of, then there's no way to get caught. Two problems: A. This is illegal. B. The cameras are capable of shooting either the front or back of a moving car.

5. Get a motorcycle. By law, motorcycles in Hawai'i aren't required to have front license plates, which seems to give them a certain advantage in the speeding-versus-camera fight. See No. 6, Part B, above.

4. Join the military. At least one Drive Time correspondent is outraged that some military drivers of out-of-state vehicles aren't required to have front license plates, giving them an unfair advantage over local drivers. Still, joining the Army to beat a speeding rap seems a little extreme.

3. Stay off state highways. Right now the program is operating only on state-maintained roadways. If you don't want to get caught, all you have to do is stop driving on the H-1, H-2 and H-3 freeways, the Pali and Likelike highways, Farrington Highway, Kamehameha Highway and just about every other major road that gets you from one place to another.

2. Buy a 1963 Volkswagen Microbus, just like the one Arlo Guthrie mentions in "Alice's Restaurant." You'll look very cool and never, ever have to worry about going faster than 35 mph.

1. Or, of course, you could just slow down and obey the speed limits.

Mike Leidemann's Drive Time column appears every Tuesday. Reach him at 525-5460 or mleidemann@honoluluadvertiser.com.