FAMILY MATTERS
Counting on Dad's humor during crises

By Ka'ohua Lucas

"It hurts, Mommy," I cried, grabbing my foot and dropping to the sand.

I must have been about 9 or 10 years old. My brother and I had been searching for sand fish in the tide pools.

In those days, only fishermen wore tabis. It was a given that if you were going to run around barefoot (and everyone did), you were certainly going to step on something sharp.

"It looks like you stepped on wana (sea urchin)," my mother said, trying to console me.

Then she turned to my father: "Honey, come look at your daughter's foot."

Unrattled, my dad sidled up to us huddling on the beach and leaned in.

"Yeah, looks like wana to me," he said. "You know what's the best thing for that?"

"What?" I asked, a rivulet of tears flowing down my cheeks.

"Shishi," he said, then chuckled.

In those days, that was the cure-all for everything.

One of the neighborhood kids got a Portuguese man o' war sting. I got stung by a bee. My brother stepped on a piece of coral.

My dad's solution? Same thing.

Mind you, he never followed through with his threat. But the mere thought of my dad making good on it made me nervous.

I have never read anything that suggests mimi (urine) is a remedy for stings. But dad was adamant about its curing powers.

It reminds me of the father in the movie, "My Big Fat Greek Wedding," who believed in spraying every wound with Windex.

Late scholar and author Mary Kawena Pukui mentions urine being used in rituals. It was believed that "mimi had an evil mana (power) of its own," Pukui wrote. "And so mimi was used to repel evil in a sort of symbolic battle between two wicked forces."

Now I know it may sound like my father was an uncaring father. But he was nothing of the sort.

His way of handling crisis situations was with humor. I think it really helped us as children deal with emergencies in a relatively rational way.

Rarely would my father become flustered.

If there was a situation he couldn't deal with at the moment, he'd say: "To (heck) with it!"

So when Hurricane 'Iwa hit the Islands in 1982, my father gazed calmly out at the surf, battering the rocks in front of our house.

My parents were sitting at the dining room table watching the 'iwa (frigate birds) circle our home as 90-mph winds punished the house.

"Well?" my mom asked while taking a sip of wine. "Those are your 'aumakua (family gods), dear. Why don't you speak to them?"

My dad said, "Quit (complaining). The roof hasn't blown off yet!"

Ka'ohua Lucas is a mother of three and holds a master's degree in education curriculum and instruction. Reach her at: Family Matters, 'Ohana Section, The Advertiser, P.O. Box 3110, Honolulu, HI 96802; or by e-mail at ohana@honoluluadvertiser.com; or fax 535-8170.