EXPRESSIONS OF FAITH
Detour is its own destination

By Rabbi Avi Magid

MAGID

Judaism teaches us to have stronger moral resolve with the arrival of Rosh Hashanah, the Jewish New Year, but not necessarily resolutions. Today is Rosh Hashanah, but I do have a resolution anyhow. I learned it on my sabbatical and it came as a surprise. Now I wouldn't trade it for anything.

I spent a huge amount of time planning out this first-in-27-years sabbatical, covering every possible topic I could think of. It's not that I am such a stickler for everything. Rather, I have always believed, as that small book title proclaimed, if you don't know where you're going, you'll end up somewhere else.

Arriving in Europe, I happily reviewed the plans with my wife, Shayna, and daughter, Lily, but should have expected something was amiss by the glazed look in their eyes. This was quickly confirmed in a major rebellion, a coup d'état on the very first day.

It appeared over a rather major point — our route from Germany to France — but I became surprisingly, disturbingly upset by it. I wanted to go directly from Germany through Switzerland to France. The family thought that Lichtenstein sounded pretty interesting. Since it was right there, why not visit it first and then take the route through Switzerland to France?

"Wait a minute," said I.

I read the books. I was the expert. It was shocking that they could question me.

In my own excitement, as well as pride for putting together what I believed to be a perfect plan, I completely forgot my family, the people I loved the most.

In that single moment, it dawned on me that the book's guiding principle wasn't necessarily right all the time. Actually, if you don't know where you're going and end up somewhere else, it's not really so bad, as long as you can appreciate where you are when you arrive.

In the final analysis, little Lichtenstein was charming, quaint, beautiful, which made Shayna happy. As it was also snowed in, it permitted Lily to learn how to ski and made her happy. And this all took place on the first three days of the trip. My family was happy, so was I. What came out of this personal comeuppance, this challenge to my expertise, was wonderful.

First, it permitted us to do more traveling than we planned and be truly pleased about it. We learned anew about each other's needs and styles until we quietly formed a pattern which was not only simple and easy, but worthwhile for everyone. I wasn't always sure where I was going but the faces of my world were right there next to me as we sped along the road of our new life.

And that was enough. More than enough to make this year better. Being flexible is pretty good after all.

Avi Magid is the rabbi of Temple Emanu-El in Honolulu. His recent sabbatical was highlighted by the birth of his first grandchild, Eliana.

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