By Siobhan McAndrew

I woke up on a Tuesday morning, fumbled down the steps of my apartment, opened a cold Diet Coke and grabbed a tub of plain nonfat yogurt.

I measured 2 tablespoons of the yogurt and placed it in a glass bowl. I walked across the kitchen, leaned against the lime green countertop and reached to the top shelf for the oatmeal.

"Not much left," I thought, as I sprinkled the few remaining oats on the yogurt.

I opened a bear-shaped bottle of honey I had bought the night before for this concoction and squeezed two big drippy drops in the bowl. "I could almost eat this," I thought.

I took a big gulp of my Diet Coke and began to stir the mixture. Next, I placed the yogurt, oatmeal and honey blend first on my cheeks and then over my entire face.

I gently massaged the mixture into my skin, moving my fingertips in a circular motion. I avoided my eye area. Some oatmeal chunks fell to my kitchen floor.

I waited five minutes, leaned over my bathroom sink, and rinsed off the mask with warm water.

Instead of starting my pre-daily grind ritual in my typical, frantic what-do-I-have-to-do when I get the office mayhem, I made the Pre-work Pampering Morning Mask, the first piece of advice in the new book "Office Spa," by Darrin Zeer.

Zeer's book promises stress relief for the working world.

Now I doubt this morning mask, or any of the more than 50 ways to pamper myself, will make me a perfect employee, the most relaxed co-worker, a better boss or a motivated multitasker. But the book is a fun diversion.

The book is the second for Zeer. His first, "Office Yoga," sold more than 150,000 copies, proving that the new-and-improved office mentality must include some TLC. Zeer has worked at spas in hotels and resorts, and spent seven years in Asia traveling and studying the Eastern arts of healing.

When I bought the book, I was amused. I like to read lists and tidbits of advice. For $9.95, I was willing and hoping to find ways to make my workplace more peaceful.

On Wednesday, I tried the Pre-Work Pampering Great Hair Day by combining distilled water and apple cider, and then pouring it through my hair. My hair really didn't look more professional that morning.

Thursday morning, I made the Spa Snack by combining nuts, chocolate chips and sunflower seeds — and ate handfuls throughout the day. I didn't feel I had any extra energy in my quest to climb the corporate ladder.

I even made myself a cup of peppermint herbal tea. I sat at my desk and tried to follow the book's directions to savor the aroma, not drink the tea. But I felt like I merely was breathing heavily over a cup of hot water. I didn't feel more refreshed.

I liked the idea of exercising while working, so spending $19.99 on a big round yoga ball seemed worth it. In tip No. 8, Zeer says the large, inflated rubber balls should be used in place of desk chairs. He says the ball will help posture by forcing the rider to constantly shift to maintain balance.

I bought the wrong size ball and couldn't use it as a chair. I spent an hour bouncing at my desk, reaching up to punch away on my keyboard anyway. Then I spent the rest of the afternoon answering questions about why I had this big ball next to my desk.

So if you are looking for advice to change the world of work, this book won't help. But if you know somebody who could use a push in the Zen direction, a good laugh or somebody with a 2-foot desk, let me know.

I can lend them my yoga ball.

Siobhan McAndrew is the assistant business editor at the Reno Gazette-Journal.