Pity a movie ticket don't cost a thing

By Chris Hewitt
Knight Ridder Newspapers

"Love Don't Cost a Thing" Rating: 2 stars Directed by Troy Beyer Starring: Nick Cannon, Steve Harvey, Christina Milian Rated: PG-13, for language and sex talk Should you go? You'll get more entertainment value from re-renting "Drumline."

You wouldn't expect a movie that cribs its title from an anonymous J.Lo song to be special, and "Love Don't Cost a Thing" isn't. Even if you were broke of ideas, you could come up with a better one than to rewrite a barely remembered Patrick Dempsey movie from the '80s about a guy (Cannon) who bribes someone to be his girlfriend so some of her popularity will rub off on him.

You don't need to have seen the prior movie to know where "Love Don't" is headed. Of course, his unpopular pals will be mad. Of course, the girl will come to love him for real. Of course, they will end up together.

Surprise is rarely the aim of romantic comedies (by my count, this is the fourth I-was-paid-to-love-you-but-then-I-really-fell-for-you movie this year), but this awkwardly directed version takes way too long to get where we knew it was going the whole time. The only reason you stick with it is Cannon's ("Drumline") take on the role, which mixes inventive humor with a sure knowledge of what it's like to feel left out.

Scratch that; there is one other good thing: Steve Harvey, who is very funny as Cannon's dad. He's too good to be wasting his time on this dreck, too.