Celebrating birthday with family is the main thing

By Ka'ohua Lucas

I have to chuckle when my birthday rolls around. I can easily predict the outcome.

This year is not any different from last, when my eldest had the stomach flu.

The day of the Punahou Carnival, my youngest is strapped with a 104.3 temperature. I stay home to nurse him.

Five days later, my birthday, he is still in bed, coughing out his guts.

"Happy Birthday, honey!" my husband sings out.

Bleary-eyed, I mumble something about having so little sleep.

"What do you want to do for your birthday?" he asks.

"I don't want to cook," I yawn.

"We'll take you out to dinner, then," the 12-year-old offers.

Meanwhile, our youngest is on the pune'e (day bed), hacking and blowing his nose.

At 5 p.m., my husband zooms into our driveway. He is laden with several Longs Drugs plastic bags.

He orders his healthy son to take the packages into the bedroom.

"Hey, Mom," the 12-year-old calls out. "Do we have any wrapping paper?"

Why don't you just use newspaper? I think to myself.

"Yes, Dear. But we only have Christmas wrap. Will that do?"

"Sure!"

While the 12-year-old is in the bedroom, my husband is frantically searching for a birthday card program on the computer.

Eventually, he gives up and resorts to using one of the many cards I have on hand for such occasions.

About 6 p.m., the gifts are wrapped and the card signed. We leap into the van and head off to dinner.

At the restaurant, my youngest begs me to open my presents.

As I tear open the Christmas wrap, I unveil an L.A. Girl "professional" hairbrush in its clear cellophane bag — the $2.99 price tag sticker still affixed. Also wrapped carefully in tissue is a bottle of Powerpuff Girls mild bubble bath.

The next present is the DVD of "My Big Fat Greek Wedding."(I hinted for a week that the DVD was going to be released the day of my birthday.)

"OK, honey," my husband says, eyes lighting up. "You are really going to like this next present."

With trembling hands, I carefully open the final wrap to unveil a Garden Starter Kit by Miracle Gro.

I couldn't conceal my immediate reaction.

"It's the quick and easy way to feed and water your lawn and garden!" says my husband. "And it cost $15 dollars!"

I guess this makes up for the time I bought him a six-pack of tuna for his birthday.

Or the time I gave him a homemade gift certificate that would allow him to redeem it for a rebuilt transmission.

Or the time the kids and I made him a tie-dyed shirt for his 40th.

As far as I am concerned, the birthday gifts are incidental. Celebrating my 45th with the 'ohana is the best gift of all.

And the message scrawled in my elder son's handwriting confirms that fact:

"Dear Mom, We all REALLY love you and are REALLY grateful for everything you've done for us. Today is your special time to relax and have FUN!!! We hope you do that on your B-day!"

Reach Ka'ohua Lucas at Family Matters, Ohana section, The Advertiser, P.O.Box 3110, Honolulu HI 96802; fax 525-8055; or ohana@honoluluadvertiser.com.