Here's to our Spam, Spam, Spam!

By Derek Paiva
Advertiser Entertainment Writer

Advertiser library photo Waikiki Spam Jam 2003 Thursday through April 5 Events include: The creation of world's longest Spam musubi (125 feet!), 12:30 p.m. Thursday, Royal Hawaiian Shopping Center fountain courtyard. Free. Taste of Paradise Spam Cook Off. Eleven local chefs conjure Spam-themed delicacies (paired with wines) for judging and tasting, 6 p.m. April 4 at the Sheraton Waikiki Hotel's Diamond Head lawn. $50. "Musubi Man," a play performed by Honolulu Theatre for Youth, 11 a.m and 2 p.m. April 5 in the Outrigger Waikiki on the Beach upper lobby. Free. Waikiki Spam Jam Street Festival. Entertainment, food booths and games, 4i10 p.m. April 5 on Kalakaua Avenue from Seaside to Ka'iulani. Free. More events, times and parking information at www.waikikispamjam.com.

Austin, Minn. The birthplace of Spam and headquarters of Spam producer Hormel Foods.

Billions of cans produced. In fact, 3.6 cans every second. The 6 billionth can of Spam rolled off the line last July. Previous billion milestones were set in 1959, 1970, 1980, 1986 and 1994. A can of Spam is consumed in the United States every 3.1 seconds.

Cupcakes. Specifically, Spam cupcakes. The 2000 "Best Spam Recipe" winner calls for two 12-ounce cans of grated Spam. Serves 12, by the way.

Daigneau, Kenneth. Pocketed $100 for the name, from its original moniker "Hormel Spiced Ham."

Earth. Those 6 billion cans, laid side by side, would circle it 15 times.

Franken, Al. The former "Saturday Night Live" cast member hosts the interactive Spam quiz at Austin's Spam museum.

Guam boasts the highest per-capita consumption in the world, at 16 cans per person annually.

Hawai'i (no surprise) consumes more Spam than any other state. More than 6.7 million cans are sold here annually, or 5.5 cans per resident.

Investors love Spam. Since the crash of tech stocks, Hormel share performance has improved regularly, thanks, in part, to consistent sales of Spam. In recent days, Hormel has been trading on the NYSE at around $21 to $21.50 a share.

Just breathe. Austin residents have commented to the press about the sweet scent of Spam often present in the town's air.

Korea, South. Along with Japan, Denmark and the Philippines, one of only four foreign country with Spam production facilities.

Letterman, David. First suggested Spam-on-a-Rope for snacking in the shower.

Monty Python's Flying Circus.

A now-famous 1970 sketch centers on the Green Midget Café, where every menu item contains Spam.

Selections include egg and Spam; Spam, egg, Spam, Spam, bacon and Spam; and lobster Thermidor aux crevettes with Mornay sauce garnished with truffle pate, brandy, a fried egg on top and Spam.

Nine thousand-plus. The membership of Hormel's Official Spam Fan Club.

Oh, what a beautiful morning!

Last year, McDonald's Hawai'i restaurants became the first in the world to sell a Spam, scrambled eggs and rice breakfast platter.

Pork and ham. The main ingredients in Spam, followed by salt, water, modified potato starch, sugar and sodium nitrite. Hormel claims the recipe hasn't changed in 66 years.

Quiet ... that's your heart bitching. Spam contains 180 calories per two-ounce serving, 140 of them from fat. It contains 16 grams of fat, six of them saturated; 40 milligrams of cholesterol and 790 mg of sodium.

Rastafarian movement founder and Ethiopian emperor Haile Selassie I toured Hormel's Austin plant in 1954.

Spam, when left uncapitalized, refers to unsolicited e-mail. Its reference is the above-mentioned Python sketch in which Vikings sing a chorus of "Spam, Spam, Spam!" so loudly it drowns out all conversation.

Thatcher, Margaret. The former British prime minister remembers Spam as a "wartime delicacy."

Uh, thanks for the thought. Official Spam-themed gifts available at www.spamgift.com include fishing lures, earrings and scented candles.

Volkswagen's first cars rolled off the line in Germany in 1937. By no coincidence, the first cans of Spam also were produced in Austin that year.

World War II. Spam brightened the rations of Allied forces liberating Europe. By 1945, more than 100 million pounds had been shipped overseas.

Xmas shopping yet? A prized upscale food item in South Korea, Spam is also sold in pricey, ornate multi-can gift boxes.

Yummy in meatloaf. "My secret is I always use fresh tomatoes, never canned. And to give it that extra zip, I mix a little Spam with the ground beef!" — Annie Wilkes (played by Kathy Bates) in "Misery" (1990).

Zucchini. No, not an official Spam flavor yet. But other Spam products and their introduction years include smoke-flavored (1971), less sodium (1986), lite (1992), oven-roasted turkey (1999), hot and spicy (2000) and, in some markets, garlic (2002).