Father's recent death stirs painful memories for Akpan
By Stephen Tsai
Advertiser Staff Writer
In the summer of 2002, University of Hawai'i football player Nkeruwem "Tony" Akpan underwent an hour-long procedure in which an image of the sun was branded on his upper right arm.
Eugene Tanner • The Honolulu Advertiser
The process was excruciating, but nothing like the silent pain Akpan has endured since his father, Robert, died of a stroke last month in Nigeria.
As he awaits plans for his father's funeral, Nkeruwem "Tony" Akpan focuses on football and academics.
Six years ago, Robert Akpan asked his only son — the fifth of his six children — not to leave Akwa-Ibom, Nigeria, to attend a high school in Alabama. Tony Akpan never could convince his father otherwise, and after leaving, his mother tried to become the peacemaker. It was the last time he would see his father.
"There are a lot of regrets," said Akpan, who went on to play basketball for UH. Akpan, in his third year at UH, joined the football team as a defensive end in April.
"I never got to see him anymore," Akpan said, "and he's dead."
Akpan described his father as a "person who has respect for people. He likes people. He was into helping people outside. He did more for people outside than (for) his own family."
Akpan said he tried without success to receive his father's blessing.
"It was hard," Akpan said. "He never accepted me coming to America for school. He wanted me to be around since I was his only son."
He said he resisted his father's pleas to return. "I knew I was having a better education here in America," Akpan said. "My sisters and my mom were in to that. They insisted I stay here."
Akpan
According to cultural beliefs, the son is required to help bury his father. The ceremony was tentatively scheduled for this week, but Akpan did not receive the proper documents to allow him to travel to Nigeria.
"Up to this moment, I don't have that information," he said. "I think my family will try to postpone it until I can get back (to Nigeria)."
For now, Akpan said he will focus on his blossoming football career. In a 55-28 victory over Fresno State last Saturday, Akpan blocked a potential game-tying field-goal attempt in the second quarter. UH coach June Jones said the play turned the game's momentum.
"It's hard, but I try to lop my mind off (the funeral) so I can concentrate on football and my academics," Akpan said.
Reach Stephen Tsai at stsai@honoluluadvertiser.com or 525-8051.
