On a shot and a prayer
• The Wedding Planner's Web log
By Tanya Bricking
Advertiser Staff Writer
Monday, Oct. 20, 2003
Thank you to the waiter at Cafe Sistina who noticed my distraught state Friday night and brought me and my fiancé a couple of shots at the end of our dinner.
"It looks like you're having a rough night," the waiter told my groom-to-be while I was in the ladies' room.
"Yeah," my fiancé replied. "We're getting married." I think he mentioned something about in-law problems, but I probably shouldn't get into that.
We didn't quite look like the happy couple.
We were arguing about our wedding planning tangle involving our location and caterer — a situation that has pitted me between my groom and my mother and each of our ideas about how to resolve the problem.
It definitely called for a shot to take the edge off.
We went surfing the next day to clear our heads of the wedding stress. Then we went to church. We also paid a visit Saturday night to my groom's favorite bartender at Murphy's Bar & Grill. For me, it was a pedicure and some shopping therapy yesterday that did the trick. I think I'm returning to my normal self instead of the mad bride.
I just finished a book my friend in Chicago sent me: "Diary of a Mad Bride" (by Laura Wolf, Delta, $10.95), and I could completely relate to the fictional account of a woman whose wedding planning threatens to kill the romance and make the bride a raving lunatic.
My fiancé could tell just reading the book was getting on my nerves. I think I'm going to stop reading all wedding-related material. An editor put another Bride's magazine on my desk this morning. It's been sitting there for hours, and I have no desire to open it.
We've got 40 days to go before the big day.
My mom has the nuns at the school where she works praying for us.
If a line to God is a viable means to get results, then something good is bound to happen. My mom says she has my intentions "literally under statues of the Infant of Prague and the Blessed Virgin."
I'll take all the prayers I can get.
Between prayers and kind bartenders, we're bound to be blessed somehow. We should get through this all right.
Tanya Bricking writes about relationships for The Advertiser. Reach her at tbricking@honoluluadvertiser.com or 525-8026.
[Posted on October 21, 2003 at 5:07 pm HST]
I loved Diary of a Mad Bride, but would not recommend it to any woman planning her wedding. I read it in the early planning stages, so it didn't completely freak me out, but I'm sure I lost a fair amount of sleep because of it. I'm sure I'd enjoy it much more now (a year and a half later) if I were to read it again.
L
Aiea
[Posted on October 21, 2003 at 1:17 pm HST]
You should check out Kualoa Ranch or see about a community center at one of the developments such as Temple Valley or one in Mililani. Those are the kind of places where you would be able to go with the caterer you've already selected and paid for. It may not be exactly as you've dreamed of but no wedding ever is!
Good Luck!
Lisa
Honolulu
[Posted on October 21, 2003 at 8:51 am HST]
I'm married to a wonderful man also in the Air Force and I've been following your column and remembering our wedding plans/headaches nearly 25 years ago. But after reading and remembering the all to many details, sleepless nights and just over-all stressed out feeling you will have (just wait til you get that 24-hour fever). It will all be worth it in the end.
I've been wanting to re-new our vows at 25 yrs and thought being in Hawaii would be the perfect place to do it, but you've helped me to decide that we are just getting a cabin at Bellows and say our "I do's" in privite with a glass of champagne on the beach. I can't think of anything more romantic than that. We wish you both a long an happy marriage as we have found.
Laurie
Hickam AFB
[Posted on October 21, 2003 at 5:42 am HST]
My fiance and I are getting married in Dec., and are having our ceremony and reception at the Koolau Golf Club. The facilities and service are both top of the line. Why not give it a try.
Good luck!!!!
Cindy
Kaneohe
