Don't think 'networking,' think 'building relationships'
By Maureen Milford
Wilmington (Del.) News Journal
Richard L. Corey is known around Wilmington, Del., as a great business networker — but that wasn't always the case.
Robert Craig • Wilmington, (Del.) News Journal
During the more than 20 years he worked at big corporations, including the DuPont Co., Corey didn't see the need to create a nexus of people outside the company. That all changed when he left DuPont and started his own company in the late 1990s.
Jessica Jennings gets a business card from Andy Taaub during a networking event at Bank One Center in Wilmington, Del. Some experts recommend sending a follow-up note after first meeting a person.
"A wise person whispered in my ear: 'You've got to get out and meet people,' " said Corey, who — through networking — teamed up with three other people this year to form Integrated Technology Solutions, which helps real estate developers, architects, interior designers and others coordinate telephones, security systems and other low-voltage technology.
"The secret to your success is people. If you stay inside your little world, it just doesn't happen," Corey said.
Unfortunately, many people don't learn this lesson until they're out of work, need to change jobs or want to start their own business, experts in networking said.
"The biggest mistake people make is waiting until something bad happens," said Rick Frishman, co-author of "Networking Magic."
"Everyone can think of two or three people who call them twice a year, and it's always when they need something. You resent it. You think: 'Where have you been the rest of the year?' "
Instead, networking should be a way of life, Frishman said. This applies to everybody — from folks who work in big corporations to college students to stay-at-home moms.
Experts offer these dos and don'ts when it comes to building a network. Do: • Shake hands and lock eyes for at least 30 seconds. • Listen. Always bring the conversation back to the other person. • Have a 30-second "elevator speech" ready that lets people know what you do. • Keep your business cards in your right-hand pocket and their business cards in your left-hand pocket. When you get home at night, put them into your database. Send a note to say you enjoyed meeting them and ask if you can help them with anything. Don't: • Look around the room for someone more important. • Give a sales pitch. • Use curse words. • Follow up with group e-mails or e-mails with attachments.
"Networking is the building and maintaining of relationships, and relationships require caring, helping, kindness, decency, trust and honoring others. In a nutshell, networking is about giving and giving generously," Frishman writes.
Networking tips
But most people are not natural networkers, experts said. This means nearly everyone has to work at it.
"It's something you've got to practice," Frishman said.
Frishman suggests people spend at least one-half hour a day reaching out to people. That could mean a phone call or e-mail or thank-you note. He even suggests putting out an e-mail newsletter with tips or helpful information. Software is available to make such e-mails seem personal and not a group mailing.
The key is to give information, thanks, congratulations or sincere compliments with no expectation of getting something in return, he said.
After meeting someone for the first time, follow up with a handwritten note within 72 hours. Otherwise, it's as if the meeting never happened, Corey said.
"People are little banks. You have to put deposits in before you can make a withdrawal,"
Frishman said.
Many try to take advantage of everyday opportunities.
Michael J. Gallo, executive vice president of Brandywine Building Services, an interior and exterior maintenance business, recalled the time he struck up a conversation with a man in an alley while working on a volunteer project that involved cleaning up trash in a deteriorating neighborhood. The man in the alley turned out to be a bank president, and the two men have become close friends.
"You can network at the gas station. You could do it at the local prayer meeting. You can do it in the grocery store," Gallo said. "I keep five business cards in my billfold at all times. I never run out."
