Posted on: Sunday, December 12, 2004
It's your funeral, so plan the details yourself
By Catherine E. Toth
Advertiser Staff Writer
And he didn't expect the funeral to cost nearly $20,000.
Five years ago his parents bought a burial plot. And that's it. What they didn't consider was all the additional costs — caskets, vases, flowers, services, facility rental, even transportation — required for a complete funeral. Wong and his sister had to put all those expenses on their credit cards.
"They say they're 'taking care of the customer,' " said Wong, 40. "But the bottom line is they're running a business."
And funerals are big business in Hawai'i, where costs — including the funeral service and cemetery fees for a burial — average between $10,000 and $15,000, according to funeral directors.
But early planning, financial experts say, is the key to reducing stress — and overall cost — in dealing with death.
Photos by Jeff Widener • The Honolulu Advertiser She recommends researching your options early, the way you would research buying a car.
"Ask for a price list, take a friend to the mortuary, talk about it when you're not upset," Ho said. "Then you can make a good financial decision. That can save you hundreds or thousands of dollars."
The problem is many families aren't comfortable discussing death. And that, experts say, is something they need to get over.
"I know death isn't something pleasant, it's not something we all want to talk about," said Mitchell Dodo, vice president of Dodo Mortuary in Hilo and president of the Hawai'i Allied Memorial Council. "But you have to come to terms with what's going to happen."
One major decision is whether to bury or cremate the body. The high cost of burials — cemeteries can charge for opening and closing the grave, grave liners, vaults for either caskets or urns, transportation to the site — has spurred the popularity of cremation, which is considered the more affordable option.
According to a recent survey by the National Funeral Directors Association, 43 percent of adults preferred cremation over a traditional burial. Hawai'i has the highest cremation rate in the United States. Of the 8,581 people who died in 2002, 64 percent were cremated.
But that doesn't mean cremation won't cost as much as a traditional burial.
"If it's just strictly a direct cremation — no viewing, just cremating the body and returning the remains in an inexpensive temporary urn — then of course it would be less expensive," Dodo said.
The costs go up when you add more extras. Many Hawai'i families will still hold a service and visitation, or viewing of the body or casket, which add costs. Some will even choose to bury the urn or place it in a niche at a cemetery.
"Then prices become comparable (to burial)," Dodo said.
Cremation fees can be as low as $300 to as high as $1,000.
After the cremation, you'll need an urn. Those cost between $25 and $1,000.
Traditional burials are typically more expensive than cremations due to the high price of caskets.
Caskets can range from $200 to $20,000, with the average hovering around $1,000, said Claus Hansen, owner of Affordable Casket Outlet in Mapunapuna. Those prices are expected to rise between 3 and 6 percent next year, due to rising metal prices.
Discount caskets are available. Even Costco got into the business in August, test-marketing six models, priced at $799.99. (Buyers also get a 30 percent discount on services from participating funeral homes.)
Early planning helped Ernestine Waidzunas, who considers herself fortunate her husband was so detail oriented.
Before he passed away in December, he put everything in a red binder. Information about bank accounts, insurance policies, funeral plans, wills. As a veteran, he arranged for a free plot with the military.
When he died, all Waidzunas had to pay for were the taxes and 10 death certificates, which totalled $160. That's it.
"Nobody is thinking straight, especially if it's a sudden death. And the mortuary can take advantage of that," said Waidzunas, 79. "I was pretty out of it for a while there, and I was lucky that everything was taken care of. Our wills, our power of attorney, everything. He did everything. ... I was very, very lucky."
Funeral directors — as with any other business — say they provide good service at a cost.
"Yes, funerals are expensive, but we provide a valuable service," said Dodo of Dodo Mortuary in Hilo. "This is the last time the surviving family is going to say their final farewells or tributes to their loved one. Can you really put a price on that? It's a once-in-a-lifetime event. You only have one chance to do it right. It's expensive, but when you consider what you're doing, I think you will find value in that."
Some people use money from the deceased's life insurance policies to help with funeral costs. Funeral homes might file a claim with the insurance company to cover costs, rather than expect the family to pay outright and wait for a reimbursement.
Of course, the most affordable options are scattering ashes, which costs just the cremation fee, or burying your loved one on your own property. State law permits home burial of family members. Home burials require a permit from the state Department of Health, and when the property is sold, the seller has to disclose that there is a buried person.
For the poor or unclaimed bodies, however, the state-run Med-QUEST program pays for burial services.
Whatever option you select, the key to saving money and heartache during such an emotional time is discussing your funeral with your loved ones and planning ahead.
"The death rate is 100 percent. Everybody will eventually die," said Kyle Watanabe, funeral director at Moanalua Mortuary, where employees don't work on commission. "You have to talk about your funeral, otherwise you'll be entrusting those left behind to make a decision based on guilt and emotions and somebody's commission check."
Reach Catherine E. Toth at 535-8103 or ctoth@honoluluadvertiser.com.
Eric S.S. Wong didn't expect his 87-year-old father to die so soon.
"You don't have to pay for what you don't need," said Karen Ho, financial educator at the Hawai'i State Federal Credit Union, who gives presentations on funeral planning. "You can save money when you understand what's required and what's not."
A family checks out caskets sold by Affordable Casket. Caskets can be expensive, but there are also rentals for use at visitations.
If you add a visitation, you'll have to rent or purchase a casket. If you purchase one, it will be cremated along with the body, so people often choose a less-expensive casket. To prepare the body for the visitation, it has to be embalmed, which costs about $500. Then there's chapel or hall rentals, which range from $150 to $1,250. There are also flowers, catered food, thank-you cards, register books. The list goes on.
An ark with urn, at Affordable Casket, is an option after cremation. State law also allows use of your own container, such as a pottery item or koa box.
This custom-decorated casket is $2,495 at Affordable Casket. You can also customize the funeral service and hold it at a personal site.
One option for reducing costs is to purchase a funeral plan with mortuaries or funeral service companies, which will lock in today's price for goods and services. Funeral costs generally rise each year.
| Knowledge is power
Doing your homework on funerals can save you thousands of dollars. Get price lists: By law funeral providers have to give out a general price list of all their goods and services, noting which are not required. For example, embalming, which can cost around $500, is not required unless you have a visitation. Visit funeral homes: People only go to mortuaries when someone dies, said Mitchell Dodo of Dodo Mortuary in Hilo. Taking a proactive approach doesn't cost anything, either. "Find out what your options are, what the chapel looks like, what happens during a funeral service," he said. "We'll be more than happy to show you, explain things to you, dispel a lot of myths and false assumptions." Consider your own urn: You don't have to purchase an urn from a funeral provider, said Karen Ho, financial educator at Hawai'i State Federal Credit Union. You can put the remains in your own container. She said families have used pottery and even specially made koa boxes to hold the ashes. Ask for rentals: If you're cremating the body but want to hold a visitation, Ho recommends asking about casket rentals, which can save you hundreds of dollars. "Funeral homes won't tell you that," she said. "It's amazing how much you can save." Research customized services: The trend now is to personalize services, which don't have to be more expensive than traditional services. "Venues are becoming more and more diverse," said Claus Hansen, owner of Affordable Casket Outlet. Beach services are popular — and inexpensive —Êoften followed by a scattering-of-ashes ceremony. Moanalua Mortuary once conducted a service in an airport hangar, which didn't cost much more than a service in a chapel, said funeral director Kyle Watanabe. Know exactly what you want: Be specific on what you want at your funeral. Do you want to be cremated or buried? Do you want a specific song played or photo displayed at your service? Do you want the service to be held in a church or have your ashes scattered in the ocean? Do you want flowers or donations? "If you plan ahead of time, your family will know what you want," Ho said. "And it will be done correctly." Get everything in order now: List what you own and where you own it. Write down names, contact numbers and account numbers for banks and brokerages, safety deposit boxes, insurance policies, pension plans, estate deeds and funeral plans. Get your will in order and assign a power of attorney. Put the name of the person you want retrieving items from your safety deposit box on your account. "Plan, plan and plan," recommended Carrie Ordonez, funeral director at Mililani Memorial Park & Mortuary. "Give everyone instructions. They'll be relieved." — Catherine E. Toth |
