KISSES AND MISSES
Are you feeling the Valentine's bah instead of the mwah?

By Tanya Bricking Leach
Advertiser Staff Writer

•	Age just a number? Last week, 42-year-old Joe wanted to know if his romance with a 19-year-old would last. This week, a 38-year-old self-proclaimed "cradle robber" has more questions. Is it all right to lie about your age in the beginning and come clean later? Let him know what you think by voting online.

All these hearts and flowers can bring out the cynics in the room before the roses have a chance to wilt.

Dear Tanya: What do I do if seeing all these couples on Valentine's Day makes me sick to my stomach?

Stay home and don't look at them?

The great thing about Valentine's Day is that it falls on a Saturday this year, so it's possible to avoid all things sappy without being subjected to the bouquets of overpriced flowers being delivered to other cubicles in your office.

It might seem like the whole world is playing doubles this weekend, but if you're single, the Census Bureau estimates there are about 293,000 never-married, single adults in Hawai'i (not to mention the divorced, separated and widowed) in the same boat.

If you're not among the shoppers the National Retail Federation expects to spend $12 billion nationwide on this Hallmark-hyped holiday, you could sit at home in your not-so-sexy pajamas and find comfort indulging in a pint of ice cream and movies that won't make you nauseous ("War of the Roses," maybe?).

Or embrace the single life, wear black and gather your single friends for an anti-Valentine's Day party.

Or, especially if you're desperate and dateless, make yourself sound fabulous with AARP Magazine's "Personal Ad Maker" (go to www.aarpmagazine.org and click on "create your own personal ad").

Or, if you're divorced, you might have plans tonight for Coates & Frey divorce attorneys' annual "Heal the Hearts" invitation-only ball, where their friends and newly single clients drown their sorrows at what's usually a rockin' party.

If you have kids, do something to make them feel loved instead of something that will end up making you feel lonely.

Valentine's Day might rival New Year's Eve as the worst night of the year for the unattached, but when it comes down to it, it's just another night. You'll get over it.

Need advice on a topic close to the heart? Send your tales, worries and woes to relationships writer Tanya Bricking Leach at Kisses and Misses, The Advertiser, P.O. Box 3110, Honolulu, HI 96802; kissesandmisses@honoluluadvertiser.com; or fax 525-8055. Letters may be used in columns. Please include a daytime phone number.