FAMILY MATTERS
Papa possesses what it takes to be top gamester
By Michael C. DeMattos
My favorite bumper sticker reads: "Old age and treachery will overcome youth and skill every time."
In our family, "old age and treachery" comes in the form of Papa. The patriarch of our motley crew, he is the ultimate gamester. Whether it is Scrabble, gin rummy, trumps, cribbage, Monopoly, chess or any other of the family games, when the contest ends, Papa can be counted upon to be the last person standing.
Now do not get me wrong, Papa is a great guy. Well-mannered and gracious in defeat, he never resorts to taunting. Papa takes on all comers, who in turn, course through games like an operator flips through the phone book looking for that elusive victory.
Papa never cheats. Unfortunately, the same cannot be said of his kinfolk. Papa does not believe in gimmes. He will not "let you win."
He appreciates that there is a right way to play every game and likely just one way to learn it — by the rules.
Papa's game has been honed through years of practice. He has been my role model and so like him I have put in long hours over the gaming board, cold beer in hand. I have paid my dues.
It is kind of like the judo student whose pristine white belt blackens over the years. Each time he falls or is thrown, he gets back up again, tightens his belt and goes back for more. He is never "awarded" a black belt; his is a reflection of his hard work and determination.
Imagine then my shock when, last weekend, my 7-year-old daughter took Papa to the cleaners five games in a row.
I was stunned. It seems that my daughter, in all her innocence, wanted to teach Papa a new game. So she brought out Connect Four. Papa had never played Connect Four and within minutes was left scratching his head. My daughter cheered with each victory and Papa laughed aloud.
As the red and yellow chips dropped, the veil of illusion lifted and I began to understand Papa's secret. At 79, he is not old and treacherous. He remains, after all these years, a child at heart.
Papa's losses were sound, though clearly he was no worse for wear. The magical fire of youth was ablaze in his eyes. It is a look I have grown accustomed to over the years.
The corner of his mouth gently raised in a faint smirk, he was having the time of his life playing a simple game of Connect Four with his granddaughter.
As I watched the two of them drop chips like coins into a slot machine, I realized that of all the lessons Papa taught me, the most important was the need to stay young at heart.
Yes, I have put in the time and paid my dues.
My belt is black.
But Papa does not win because he is seasoned; he wins because he can be a child.
Papa has dropped a few games over the years, but he has always been a winner.
Family therapist Michael C. DeMattos has a master's degree in social work.
