Work out finances before walking down aisle

By Deborah Willoughby
Montgomery (Ala.) Advertiser

Ira and Josenca Shaw of Montgomery, Ala., discussed finances during premarital counseling. Josenca Shaw said the financial discussions before their March wedding were beneficial and said she recommends such counseling for other engaged couples. Gannett News Service

"We went through premarital counseling, which I recommend for everyone," Josenca Shaw said. "Finances were one of the things we discussed. It was very beneficial."

Topics ranged from their credit status and budgeting to how they paid their bills and saved money. They talked about what expenses they could reduce when they combined their households and they had a budget in place before their wedding.

"We were trying to get everybody on the same page," Ira Shaw said. "We looked at where we could cut bills, like trying to find a family plan for our cell phones."

Student loans, expensive cars and credit card debts can create unpleasant surprises for newlyweds who don't prepare for the financial realities of marriage.

"It is extremely important that a young couple get their finances in order at the onset," said the Rev. Clifford M. Terrell, pastor of Gospel Tabernacle Church of God in Christ in Montgomery, Ala.

"It's important to know before you walk down the aisle what kind of obligations you are signing up for," Terrell said.

Here are financial ideas for engaged couples:

Make a full disclosure: "One of the first things they should do is disclose the debt and bills that each party has," said the Rev. Kyle Searcy of Fresh Anointing International Church in Montgomery, Ala. Don't wait until after marriage to learn about the student loans or credit card bills.

Take a financial course: Searcy recommended that couples go through a formal process such as those developed by Dave Ramsey (www.daveramsey.com) or the late Larry Burkett (www.crown.org).

Ramsey's Financial Peace University is a 13-week program that helps participants develop financial programs based on Ramsey's book "Total Money Makeover." Many churches offer the program, and ministers recommend it for couples.

Burkett's Christian financial guides such as "Money Before Marriage: A Financial Workbook for Engaged Couples" encourage serious discussions about important topics.

Pool your finances: "Scripture says, 'Two shall become one,' " Searcy said. "I recommend that they operate as a unit and pool their finances together from the beginning. I don't think it's healthy to have two separate accounts. Financially, we should operate as a unit."

Make a budget: Don't wait for financial misunderstandings to crop up before establishing a budget. Set up a plan and a financial structure immediately.

Don't overspend on a wedding: "I really don't believe weddings should be as expensive as they are," Searcy said. "A lot of that money should be invested toward the future."

Save before you spend: "Young couples try to get too much too fast," Searcy said. Couples who save money so they can pay cash for cars or even houses are showing financial wisdom.

Consider a prenuptial agreement: This isn't for everyone, but it's a good idea for some couples. Older people with established households and children from an earlier marriage can prevent family conflicts and make sure inheritances are fair by writing a formal agreement before the wedding.

"I believe in prenuptial agreements for individuals who are older and on their second marriage," Terrell said.

"I'm thinking from a standpoint of doing the right thing, for providing an inheritance for your children's children, according to Proverbs. I think older couples need to be as intense, maybe in a different manner, in financial arrangements than a younger, first-marriage couple. I don't think it takes away from love," he said.