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By Lee Cataluna
Advertiser Columnist
There was a time when Tiane McNeil hardly went to school. When she did make it to class, "the work I put out was minimal," she says.
After failing her freshman year of high school, McNeil transferred to Halau Lokahi Public Charter School. There, in a smaller setting immersed in the Hawaiian culture, McNeil gained the confidence to face the truth.
"I confronted my sexuality and embraced it," McNeil said. She is male-to-female transgendered. "Although in doing so, it may appear to others that I had just put more obstacles in my way, I know that it was the first step in identifying who I was and who I wanted to be. There has never been a day where I regretted doing so. Since then I have developed my true character and a healthy, positive look on life."
McNeil
At Halau Lokahi, McNeil is accepted by her classmates, who unanimously voted her Winterball Queen.
"I am surrounded by kids who are into their Hawaiian culture," she says. "They know that this is something that wasn't looked down upon."
McNeil went from failing school to becoming a star student who now plans to go to college. Her goal is to get an advanced degree in Hawaiian Studies and teach at a university.
"Now I produce work that reflects the pride that I have in myself. Now I can stand in front of an audience and they can see my potential and self-worth. Now I can walk down the street and look people in the eye. ... Now I enjoy the life that God had intended me to live."
Though the surroundings in school were supportive and nurturing, McNeil is well aware that prejudice and discrimination exist in the larger community.
"Where do the youth get the idea that it's OK to discriminate against certain people? Adults and parents need to teach what is pono, not negative things."
McNeil will be honored along with Alex Ortiz and Wendee Augustiro as a Youth Grand Marshal of the 2004 Honolulu Gay Pride parade next weekend.
"Pride can be shown in many different ways," McNeil wrote in an essay for the event. "How you carry yourself, head held high, back straight, not looking above others but right at them. Be proud, but not too proud. Humility goes hand in hand with pride. Pride can also be shown in how you treat others, exemplifying kindness and respect to all yet standing your ground when the time calls for it."
The Honolulu Gay Pride 2004 parade takes place June 19, starting at 9:30 a.m. from Ala Moana Beach Park to Kapi'olani park. For more information, call the Gay & Lesbian Community Center at 951-7000.
Lee Cataluna's column runs Tuesdays, Fridays and Sundays. Reach her at 535-8172 or lcataluna@honoluluadvertiser.com.
