COMMENTARY
Why parents, children prefer public school
By Robbie and Cindy Alm
Our children go to public schools. By choice. Ours to begin with; theirs to continue.
It's not that we think poorly of Hawai'i's private schools; we have a great private-school system. But we value the public schools and the public-school education.
Life is about choices: what you emphasize and what you don't. In our experience, the greatest part of life is people. We come in all shapes and sizes. We have all kinds of strengths and flaws. We sometimes like school, and lots of times we don't. Sometimes we're well behaved, sometimes not.
We hope we get better (read "mature") as we grow, but the truth is that we remain much the same people throughout our lives. And the best way to enjoy and succeed in life is to be able to accept and honor, and even celebrate, the crazy quilt we are as people.
We love the way our daughters see life. They are so much less judgmental than we are, they have very little sense of category (especially ethnicity), they are willing to walk into new situations and new places in ways we probably would not, and they have no sense of being in any way set apart.
They see themselves as part of a very large group.
So when we ask our older daughter where she wants to go to college, she tells us: a big state university on the West Coast. She wants to be with lots of people and lots of variety. And we look at each other and think, this is great!
Our daughters are good students, but there is so much more they want: friends, hula, piano, gymnastics, family outings, shopping and, of course, grandparents. We want them to do well in school, but even more we want them to live good and meaningful lives. We believe that they are on that path and that their public-school days are an important part of that journey.
And what do we hope they will have for their lives? An ability to find the good in almost any experience, an acceptance of that mix of good things and bad things that is life, a genuine aloha and love for the people they are with, a sense of values other than material, and an ability to work with anyone.
We see it growing in them and we feel good about our choices.
Yet, we recognize the challenges.
Do we sometimes see a great weariness in some of the teachers and staff, the bureaucracy sometimes getting the better of them? Sure, we do.
Do we often wish they had a fuller set of resources: newer materials, better academic and athletic facilities? Sure, who wouldn't?
And would we want there to be greater levels of personal attention and individualized education than is currently available? Of course.
But that is also life. All of those issues await us throughout our lives, and the question is always the same: Given what you have, what are you going to do?
And we also have found that there is great passion that accompanies the sometime weariness; that in the end, the facilities don't matter as much as the people, and that if you ask for help, you will receive a surprising amount.
Our public schools are good places, filled with all of the same people we meet in life — people who want to do good things, have good days and bad days, want to make a meaningful contribution, and in spite of all of the challenges, come back the next day for more.
And our public schools are not broken. We have tens of thousands of our young people, including our daughters, there every day, learning and growing. And every year they graduate and join the workforce or go on to higher education.
Can our schools get better? Yes. Should we be satisfied with what we have today? No.
We need to approach our work with great appreciation and respect for what we already have, and focus on working together to get better and better and better.
Robbie and Cindy Alm are proud public-school parents.
