Pregnant Schofield wives lend support to each other

By Mike Gordon
Advertiser Staff Writer

As the wife of an Army commander, Lynn Leith is well-versed in leadership and responsibility. She has been surrounded by it every day for nearly three years.

Lynn Leith, pregnant and due any day, watches a tape of her husband, Lt. Col. Scott Leith, with her two boys Jake, 7, left, and Andrew, 4. Lt. Col. Leith reads to his children on the tapes, recorded before his deployment to Iraq. Gregory Yamamoto • The Honolulu Advertiser

She calls it "Operation Bun in the Oven."

Through the years, countless babies have been born during military deployments. It's practically a given.

But none of that soothes the jangled nerves of the mothers-to-be at Schofield Barracks, especially the young ones whose husbands have never been away from home for very long.

Leith wants to make sure every pregnant spouse with the battalion knows that help, advice and support are only a phone call away.

She doesn't have an exact head count, but at least 20 of the 200-plus wives from her husband's battalion are either pregnant or have given birth since the troops left Jan. 21 for a one-year deployment.

They've delivered about two a week, with several more babies on the way, she said.

And this includes Leith, who could deliver any day now.

"That's why I feel for the young gals, the ones who are having their first baby," she said last week. "I don't know how I would feel having to deliver without my husband if it was our first birth. It sounds scary to me."

When Leith learned last fall that the Army would send her husband to Iraq with the Wolfhounds (the regiment's nickname) she was struck with a personal revelation.

"It was like I was meant to be pregnant," she said. "As soon as I found out, I thought it was a sign: I'm supposed to help the young wives. I think I'm serving as a role model in some way."

Leith and other Schofield women have created a network: small strike teams, to borrow an Army phrase, that deliver meals, run errands, listen to problems. They make sure someone is there to help with birthing classes and hospital deliveries.

And they stay in touch.

When a baby is born — a Wolfhound pup, Leith said — everyone is notified, hospital room numbers are shared and visits are planned.

One of the wives from the battalion's Alpha Company calls Rosslyn Wells every day. Wells is nearly five months pregnant and having a rough time. She was so sick in the beginning, she lost 20 pounds.

Knowing someone is there to help is a big comfort for Wells, who also has a 10-year-old son.

Still, because she quit her job, she has plenty of time to think about the changes in her life. Too much time.

"So I get up and do the laundry or the dishes and that keeps me busy," she said.

Her husband, a 20-year-old specialist, is a long way from their Mililani home and even farther it seems, from ultrasound images, baby heartbeats played loud and breathing exercises.

So much of it makes her nervous, said the 30-year-old Wells.

"I'm nervous about him not being here," she said in a rush of thoughts. "I'm nervous about how I will be afterwards — postpartum depression and he's not here. I'm worried about what the bond will be like between him and the baby when he does come back.

"And you hear about how some wives who give birth while their husbands are gone are resentful and they don't know it. Little things like that go through my head."

Wolfhound wife Amber Parkes is also helping with the battalion's support group. The Mililani mother is pregnant, too.

Her husband, a supply and logistics officer, was with Parkes when their first child was born, but he won't be here when No. 2 arrives in July.

"It's a bittersweet feeling," Parkes said. "You know, expecting a child is such a miracle. You want to share it with your best friend, your spouse, and they are not here."

The situation breeds empathy, said Parkes, a 30-year-old former Army nurse who worked with newborns.

Sometimes, family isn't who you're related to, she said. It's who's closest to you.

"One of our wives doesn't have family so she is dependent on the other spouses for support," Parkes said. "We are all trying to be there for one another, pregnant or otherwise. We are one another's family."

Reach Mike Gordon at mgordon@honoluluadvertiser.com or 525-8012.