BOOKS FOR KEIKI
'Storm Dog' bilingual debut for new Hawai'i publishing house

By James Rumford
Special to The Advertiser

Creating a children's picture book is a balancing act: The words cannot outweigh the pictures. And the pictures cannot overpower the words.

Writing a no-talk-stink review takes just as much care — balancing criticism with praise, hoping not to sound like Simon Cowell on "American Idol."

So here goes, my thoughts about a new book from a new publisher in Hawai'i.

The book is "The Storm Dog of the Ko'olaus" by Auntie U'i (U'ilani Goldsberry of La'ie), illustrated by Roy Chang and put into Hawaiian by David del Rocco. The publisher is Beachhouse Publishing, in 'Ewa, headed by Jane Hopkins.

The goal of Beachhouse is to make books for Hawai'i's children, and "The Storm Dog of the Ko'olaus" appears to be the publisher's first endeavor, and — happily — one of too few locally-produced books this year to be in both Hawaiian and English.

The book recounts the tale of Kauhi (Kauhi'imakaokalani), prince of Ka'a'awa, who meets Pele's sister Hi'iaka (Hi'iakaikapoliopele on her way from the Big Island to Kaua'i. Suddenly a storm arises, and Kauhi takes Hi'iaka into a cave to seek shelter. The storm is the Storm Dog that claws at the Ko'olaus with such ferocity that it turns them into the craggy mountains they are today.

During the storm, Kauhi falls in love with Hi'iaka, but their love is short-lived because Hi'iaka must leave for Kaua'i. Kauhi promises to wait for her to return, but she never does. Eventually, Kauhi climbs a cliff. There he waits so long that he turns to stone. Today you can still see him in the stone formation known more familiarly as "the crouching lion" (a rock outcropping on a ridge overlooking Kahana Bay, between Ka'a'awa and Punalu'u).

The author, "Auntie U'i", who has co-authored works with her writer-husband Steven and worked on a number of cookbooks for Sam Choy, writes well and creates clear images when she talks about the waves "sharp as white blades," and 'ehu hair the "color of cut koa." She also establishes a fine rhythm as she describes the storm as a dog biting and ripping at the mountain ridges.

But in other places Auntie U'i's imagery falters a bit. She also has a hard time dealing with the budding love affair between Kauhi and Hi'iaka, and the momentum she has built up in the story is diminished accordingly. In the midst of her description of the storm, she pauses to say the two fell in love. And without catching a breath, returns to the storm!

The illustrations done by Roy Chang support the story well. He masterfully handles pastels to create gorgeous views of the Ko'olaus. He pounds the chalk, or so it seems, into the paper to make the storm scenes as fierce as they can be. This is all to the good, but on the other side of the balance are his stiff, awkward drawings of Kauhi and Hi'iaka, which detract from the visual story he tells.

As for the Hawaiian translation, del Rocco, of the Hawai'i State Library, has done an excellent job. His words are well chosen. His Hawaiian is straightforward and clear, and his style is reminiscent of that of the 19th-century historian Samuel Kamakau.

If I were to put Del Rocco's translation on the balance, I'd have to say that his words are a bit too straightforward and that his translation as a whole is much too close to the English. This may be because the author wanted it this way. Even so, I tend to prefer a looser, freer translation.

On the upside, a beginning language student could easily follow Del Rocco's Hawaiian, since it parallels the English in structure and expression. On the down side, I feel that the translation could have been more complex and therefore more interesting, especially for immersion students. Why not be adventuresome and emulate the structures and stylistic devices used by the late Auntie Sarah Nakoa or found in the works of Moses Nakuina, who wrote a century ago?

They say that it takes 15 positive comments to offset one negative comment. So much for my dream of a balanced critique. But for what it is worth, I hope that my words will give you something to think about when you go to check this book out for yourself.

As for Beachhouse Publishing, which publisher Jane Hopkins describes as "just a little guy right now," I say, i mua!

James Rumford is an author and illustrator of children's books, and lives in Manoa. He and Jolie Jean Cotton alternate in reviewing children's books for this page on the first Sunday of each month.