FAMILY MATTERS
Chasing a pot of gold deprives us of riches now
By Michael C. DeMattos
It is a near-nightly ritual for me.
I head into the home office to get some work done. First I check my e-mail, then I crank up the browser to check on the latest news from the Reuters, the Times and CNN.
When all that is done, I am ready to get to work.
Well not quite ready. Inevitably I check some of my favorite Web sites. Many of those sites hold contests, and that is where the trouble usually begins.
Just last night I entered a contest on pgatour.com to win a trip for two to Ireland to play golf with my hero, David Feherty. I know that the odds of me winning are a gazillion to one, but I entered anyway.
Hey, who wouldn't want to play a round with a tour professional?
About a week ago, one of the local radio stations had a contest for the premiere movie event of the year. All I had to do was be caller No. 18. To be honest I do not remember what the movie was, but there I was, dialing into busy signals for nearly five minutes.
I even live vicariously through others. Do not even get me started on "American Idol."
I know when all this craziness started.
About three months ago, I was walking nine at one of the municipal golf courses, matched with some guy from Kaimuki. I noticed that he had a Pebble Beach golf tag on his bag. Being the conversationalist from hell, I boldly asked him if he had actually been there. Turns out he had. Evidently he was cruising a golf site on the Internet when a free-contest pop-up ... well ... popped up. He entered and then, six months later, he was carting around one of the premiere courses in the world.
Since then, it has been all downhill for me. I have entered contests to win free home makeovers, golf clubs, trips to Europe, compact discs, homes in the Caribbean, a winery of my very own, even gasoline, which would be especially nice right about now.
It kind of creeps me out when I think about it, but I do it anyway. Or at least I used to.
You see, I am turning a new leaf. I am pulling my chips, packing the dice, stowing the cards.
I know that I am not alone. We live in a jackpot nation in which we are willing to take our chances with the next "free" contest that promises a pot of gold at the end of the rainbow.
It seems that there is always someone winning something and that it is just a matter of time until we get ours.
But we do not usually get ours. The line of winners is shorter than the length of our dreams. But dream we do. We have been sold a golden opportunity and we line up to buy.
It is the human condition to hope and have faith that things will turn out for the best and I think by and large they do, it is just that we do not realize it at the time. We are too busy chasing what we could be or could have to appreciate who we already are and what we have already got.
Family therapist Michael C. DeMattos has a master's degree in social work.
