RAISE A GLASS
The wines you want if stranded with Halle

By Heath Porter

The great thing about working in the restaurant business is getting to answer a vast array of questions. Don't get me wrong, answering questions and playing devil's advocate in debates can be one of the best parts of the job. But if someone doesn't help me find that island soon, I will definitely explode.

What island, you ask? The one where every one of us has been a million times, with a million objects, songs, cars, foods, wines, people, etc. The island where Halle Berry lives with Brad Pitt (not to be gender biased), driving a '57 Corvette, wearing Armani, playing "horse" with Larry Bird and listening to Led Zeppelin 4.

That's the island central to the classic question, "If you were stranded on a desert island and could only have one (fill in blank) what would it be?" Of course, we've discussed the topic millions of times, but I hear it asked about wine all the time.

Honestly, there's no right or wrong answer, but it is a harder question than, say, "Dude, which Van Halen tape would you take? Uh, with or without David Lee Roth? Sorry, as we all know there is no Van Halen without David Lee Roth."

Back to the point. Do you narrow the wines down by varietal? Do you go with vintage? Availability? Let's say it's a sensible island. It's hot and there's no place for storage. Oops, there goes the old vintage Burgundy and Bordeaux wines. You will have to eat, so there goes most oaky wines. You won't have thousands of dollars on you in the wreck and probably won't get to stop by the wine country, so let's rule out all of those 1920-something and pre-phylloxera type wines. Let's look at stuff we might find at the local wine shop.

As we said, it will be hot and you will need refreshing. Clean, crisp white wine is the at-the-beach, around-the-oasis drink of choice. Sauvignon Blanc from central France (Sancerre or Pouilly Fume) is very quenching. None of that overwhelming oak to make you spit wood — just great acidity to make you beg for another sip.

Of course, you'll need something light and understated to go with all of the shellfish coming from the bay where you swim in the eve with Halle, and what could be better than a white wine from the south of France? Hints of brininess and light to medium acid would make those shrimp so much better off the barbie.

When you finally catch that marlin or snapper and are preparing it as sashimi or in a sizzling Chinese style (from the ingredients you borrowed from the next island over), what could be better than an aromatic, elegant pinot gris from Alsace or Oregon? Clean enough for the sashimi, and medium viscosity with ample acid for the Chinese preparation.

As luck would have it, you did manage to swipe a bottle of red wine from the captain's quarters when he was playing shuffleboard on deck with Charo. This parlayed into a beautiful pairing when you trapped a wild boar on the way back from the bay and plank-smoked it for dinner. Good thing the captain was from Spain because that Grenache from Calatayud, with its earthy, smoky flavors, was a perfect accompaniment to the boar.

Finally, how could you not hope for a plush, full-bodied dessert wine to go with the coconut cream pies Ginger and Mary Ann have been cooking (from the coconuts Larry Bird picked) — good sweetness and a little toastiness to go with those open-flame-baked pies.

I guess all of these wines could become a bit redundant, depending on how long it takes to be rescued. But how would you be able to complain? You would have been doing nothing more than discussing 1980s Celtics vs. Lakers matchups with Bird. Listening to Zeppelin's finest repeatedly. Tooling around in a vintage 'Vette and having an impromptu five-course meal with Halle Berry as your sommelier!

• The first wine Halle will be featuring is Sancerre by Hippolyte Reverdy — 100 percent Sauvignon Blanc, crisp and clean, with essence of minerals and zesty citrus. About $20.
• Second wine will be Picpoul de Pinet by Hugues Beaulieu — Picpoul is the varietal, and Pinet is the town in southern France. Simple but lively, all-encompassing food wine. Less than $15.
• Third course will be accompanied by Chehalem pinot gris from north Oregon, with the huge Willamette Valley appellation. There's a regular and a reserve between $12 and $25. Both have serious texture, but the reserve has more neutral oak.
• Halle saunters by with wine No. 4, a fantastic red from the Calatayud area of Spain, Vina Alarba Old Vines Grenache — spice, earth and a complete finish of tannin and acidity. Under $15.
• Finally, for dessert, a Sauternes from a producer who likes new oak, Chateau Gravas; $20. Predominately semillon, with a traditional blend of muscadelle and sauvignon, for a plush, tropical, wonderful dessert wine.

Enjoy the island, enjoy the wine, but if Angelina Jolie shows up with Halle Berry, well, then that's a different article, and don't tell my fiancée!

Heath Porter is the general manager and wine director at the Diamond Head Grill on the second floor of the W Hotel, 2885 Kalakaua Ave.; 922-3734.