All was good. We were racing down the fast track, but I think I frightened her away. Instead of playing by the "rules," maybe I communicated too frequently with too much heartfelt honesty.

I might have come across as desperate, though I was quite content being single when we met.

Now that our relationship has fizzled, is there any way to repair the damage I've done? I want to at least keep her friendship, as she is the most intelligent and promising lady I've met.

What's a guy to do?

— MR. SMITTEN

I'm biting my tongue here to keep from saying, "She's just not that into you."

Ever since I read the Oprah-endorsed "He's Just Not That Into You" book, that line is stuck in my head.

If she gave you the "I just want to be friends" speech or doesn't return your phone calls, the line could ring true.

If so, back off and save yourself the grief of rejection.

But if you get the vibe that she's still open to going out when you suggest a date, you have a shot.

Luckily for you, I don't think the "just not that into you" line is a one-size-fits-all answer, especially when it comes to courting women.

We are complicated creatures. (Or just plain fickle.)

Sometimes, persistence pays off.

Women might claim they don't want Mr. Nice Guy. But a bad experience with the alternative can quickly change their minds.

When it comes down to it, sensitive, dependable men who are honest about their feelings beat the other guys any day.

If you've been struck by the "too nice" curse, you may just have to find another woman who appreciates those merits.

It's possible you came on too strong or that this woman was not quite as smitten as you were.

Why come this far without finding out for sure?

You've got to follow your gut to decide between giving her enough space to miss you and showing enough tenacity to win her over.

The bottom line is there has to be a spark. If you aren't clicking, there isn't any amount of friction that will light the fire.