In the eight months that Natalie Butler has fretted and prayed for her husband, Staff Sgt. Travis Butler, the news of the deaths came hardest.

Travis Butler didn't know the two other Hawai'i soldiers well, but the heavy construction equipment supervisor with the 84th worked with them at Balad Air Base.

"I just remember him saying, 'I know them,' and the feeling over there was I guess just sadness for all of the soldiers there," Natalie Butler said. "I think one of the things during the memorial, the wife of Sergeant Medina had said, 'Cherish your soldier, because you don't know when you are going to see him again.' "

Although the 37-year-old military wife has a strong faith that keeps her going and keeps worry to a minimum, it was a reality check.

"I wasn't worried, because my faith is in the Lord. But nothing bad had happened to our battalion before that," she said. "It just hit — it's real and it's dangerous, because being here we can't grasp what they are going through."

Travis Butler

These days, Natalie Butler is pretty upbeat, because eight months have passed and just four months — she hopes — remain on her husband's Iraq time card.

His return, with that of other Schofield Barracks soldiers in Iraq, is getting close enough to spark thoughts of welcome-home parties and two-parent homes again.

"It's very exciting. But at the same time, knowing we still have four months to go, it's almost like seeing the light but not yet touching it," Butler said Friday at the family's home at Wheeler.

The battalion left Jan. 23. to build roads and schools at and around the air base, about 50 miles north of Baghdad, and make airfield improvements. Travis Butler's squad also did some work at Abu Ghraib prison.

Joshua Butler, 3, runs around the kitchen while his sister, Elizabeth, 9, helps take out the trash. Natalie Butler looks after them full time while her husband, Staff Sgt. Travis Butler, is deployed in Iraq. Bruce Asato • The Honolulu Advertiser

"One day, everything is peaceful and calm, and the next day it's chaotic," Butler said. "Josh is crying for Dad and Elizabeth is wanting him, and of course I go through that as well, so really every day is different."

Travis Butler, 32, has been active-duty Army for 11 years. He also served as a Marine, and has deployed to Somalia, the western Pacific and Kosovo. His daughter has been through deployments before; his son takes it harder. Travis doesn't talk about firefights with his wife, and she doesn't ask.

It's the little things she misses: hearing him come through the door, holding his hand in the car, having his arm around her at church — as well as having him home to cut the grass and take out the trash.

Natalie Butler heads up the Company B family support group. She also is active with Word of Life church. Other military spouses offer support, although many returned to the Mainland for the deployment.

With so many soldiers gone, it's made for a deserted base.

"It's so noticeable," she said. "Even the little things, like getting in line at Burger King — there aren't a ton of soldiers in there at lunch time or at the PX."

Her husband got 15 days of leave in July, and they met him in California, where he bought a Harley Davidson. But it took him a while to relax, she said. He was "very tense and observant of everything around him."

Going back was harder than leaving the first time, but Natalie, who keeps in touch with Travis by phone, e-mail and webcam, said "he needed the rest."

"He just wanted to think about family, and being with us and not thinking about the military and where he was at," she said.

Now she's planning for the big return.

"Just knowing I'd be able to see him again after that (leave), I was just like, all right, let's get it over with. Let's go."