Posted on: Tuesday, April 5, 2005

ABOUT WOMEN
Vegas can fulfill our fantasies

Ladies, the time has come.

We've saved our money. We got the cute top to go with the hip-huggers. We've made our reservations at the day spa. We've honed our Texas Hold 'Em.

Vegas, baby.

Ah, the heart swells to think of it. Days lounging by the pool, gently stabbing at slushy coladas with a straw. Afternoons passed out in the sauna after a rubdown. Nights wearing down the heels of our shoes doing the One, Two Step.

And blackjack after blackjack. Sevens and Elevens. Full houses with a set of Queens. Pay the lady, pay the lady, pay the lady.

Put aside gender, ethnicity and whatever caste system you subscribe to, there are really only two categories of people, especially on these Islands:

Those who love Vegas and those who don't.

For those who love it, you know what I'm talking about: It's naughty time. Time to be completely self-indulgent and calorie ignorant.

Red Square martinis at the Mandy. Doing the "Oceans 11" line up at the Bellagio fountains. Two go-rounds on the New York, New York roller coaster.

And food. What will it be? The Kobe beef burger with sweet-potato fries at Burger Bar? Black pepper shrimp at P.F. Chang's? Filet mignon at Smith & Wollensky? The entire menu at Nobu?

Oh, let's just have one of everything. With all those clubs to choose from, we're gonna bootie-shake those calories to smithereens anyway.

Did you hear? Megabucks is almost $12 million! Us girls are celebrating a 30th birthday in our group, and three is the magic number. Hey, it could come up!

Does anybody happen to know what's $12 million after taxes?

I'll figure that out while chilling at the spa. I've got that sports massage coming, you know, the deep-tissue one that really fires up my math skills. And after tabulating my riches, I'll sit on those plush couches in a thick robe, smelling of lavender, sipping a cappuccino and idly leaf through whatever trashy mag they've got lying about, the kind I can't be bothered to peruse in my oh-so-serious workaday life. I'll look up my horoscope and see if it knew I was going to win Megabucks. I'll learn His 10 Secret Pleasure Spots and How to Accessorize for Less Than $100.

And when it's over, we'll board the plane, exhausted, the money gone, our fantasies of Megabucks washed away, hearing the disapproving tone of our financial planners who had oodles of better uses for the cash we blew.

But what memories we'll have. Smiles for miles — roughly 2,550 of them, according to my airline mileage statement.

See, what happens in Vegas doesn't really stay in Vegas. It's a joy you keep, surrounding you in a bubble of glee that the tension of work or home can't penetrate.

And when it does, you just go back.

Reach soon-to-be millionaire Christine Strobel at cstrobel@honoluluadvertiser.com.