Posted on: Saturday, April 16, 2005

EXPRESSIONS OF FAITH

By Michele Ouansafi

A question has been raised about Muslim women and men praying together in the same room. Women in the West use the mosque for socializing as well as for worship and want to be able to relax, perhaps take off the hijab (head scarf), or breast-feed their child in the privacy of their own space. Here, it is no different. Women had direct input and influenced the final design for renovating the O'ahu mosque. An overwhelming majority voted for the separation of men and women for privacy as well as functionality.

I've heard criticism that men and women do not pray together. I respond that in prayer you do not interact with those around you; it is a sacred time between you and God. Islamic prayer requires both men and women to put their foreheads to the ground while on the hands and knees. This is a position of vulnerability as well as surrender performed with complete abandonment. How can we truly concentrate on our prayer if men must walk by and through us to get to the front of the room to perform their prayers?

Equality for Muslim women is a hot topic. But what is equality? Equality means to be of the same value or worth; it does not mean to be identical to. Women must embrace all of the God-given gifts that they have been bestowed, the position they have been elevated to in society and let go of the concept that they must be the same as a man in order to be of any value or importance.

We need to learn to embrace our own spirit and recognize that we are different from men and be grateful for these differences. Women's roles and responsibilities are not about the household chores but rather about the reality that women hold the key to the heart and soul of the family. Women are inherent nurturers; this God-given gift is often overlooked and undervalued not only by the men that we claim oppress us but also by women in our quest to be the same as men.

We have abandoned and diminished the role that we were intended to fulfill. It is with the blessing of God that women have been given the awesome responsibility to mold the values and virtues of our children.

A woman leading prayers is not a cause for celebration; it's a travesty. Women want to be respected, loved and cherished. However, we do not gain these virtues by breaking down the barriers that make men and women different. We do so by embracing the position God has elevated us to. Instead of looking to men as the cause of our discontent, we should instead look within and see why we fight so hard against our own nature in our quest to be the same as a man.

Those who strive to change Islam should look for a different religion. It is historically and religiously clear that women have never, nor were they ever intended to lead a mixed-gender prayer. If there are those who would like to be led in prayer by a woman, by all means it's a free country. However, you forfeit the right to call it Islam.

As it is with anything in life, we cannot hear the message until our hearts are sincerely open and when this happens we wonder why we didn't get it sooner.

Michele Ouansafi is a member of the Muslim Association of Hawai'i.