For the elder Hoe, who served as a combat medic in Vietnam in 1968 with a long-range reconnaissance patrol team, different races, religions, backgrounds and even music tastes were united under that flag, which was and still is intended for the family of a fallen platoon leader when his body is found.

The "battle flag," which temporarily was with the 25th Infantry Division (Light) in Afghanistan, and was with his son when he died in an ambush in Mosul, is following Nainoa Hoe's body home.

A memorial will be held from 6 to 9 p.m. tonight at Kawaiaha'o Church, with a service at 7 p.m.

Burial for the 27-year-old Maunawili man, 1995 Kamehameha Schools graduate and University of Hawai'i ROTC standout will be held at 1 p.m. tomorrow at Hawai'i State Veterans Cemetery in Kane'ohe.

Allen Hoe and fellow Vietnam War vets Fred Kobashikawa and Tom Stirling gather every Dec. 23 at the Vietnam and Korean war memorial at the State Capitol to say a few words.

Retired Army Lt. Col. Bob Takao, a friend, related what Hoe had said most recently, words to the effect that, "It's really different having gone over and served, and to have a son in harm's way, and that in fact, I may outlive my son."

It's a worry over sacrifice for flag and country that lives on for the Hoes. Another son, Nakoa, is a private first class with the 100th Battalion, 442nd Infantry Regiment and was preparing for duty in Iraq when word came of his brother's death.

Kobashikawa, who has acted as a spokesman for the family, said there is no word on whether Nakoa, as a surviving son, will deploy to Iraq.

The Hoe family issued a statement saying it was "deeply humbled by the outpouring of love and aloha for Nainoa."

"We are truly blessed with wonderful memories of his life and remain in awe of the countless others whose lives he touched and made a difference," the family said. "We wish to extend our sincerest mahalo to everyone for your prayers and messages of love and support."

Nainoa's love for his wife and being an Army infantry officer provides a consolation which helps at this painful time, the statement said.

The family also asked the community to remember the Hawai'i Guard and Reserve soldiers of the 29th Brigade Combat Team as it prepares for duty in Iraq.

"We appreciate the community coming together; please continue your support and prayers for the servicemen and women in harm's way. With Hawai'i's own 29th Brigade now moving into its war footing, remember the families at home who will live in fear every day until their loved ones return. Help them now, love them now and share your aloha with them now as we have learned to cherish life in this special place we call home."