While it may be true that opposites attract, conflicting attitudes about spending and saving can create strife in a relationship. But there are strategies couples can adopt to deal with their differences, whether it's opening "his," "hers" and "ours" checking accounts, developing a budget or seeking professional help.

The solution for Gonzalez, 28, a publicist, and Cruzada, 24, a press officer, was getting a money management program.

Now they sit at their computer every week or so and work out a spending plan. They even generate graphs and charts to see how close they are to their spending and savings targets.

Financial planners say couples should confront their money differences before getting married.

"Some people think that if they talk about money, it dampens the romance," said Violet Woodhouse, a financial planner in Newport Beach, Calif.

But money is about more than cash in and cash out, she said. "It's about power. It's about the ability — or inability — to communicate your position. It's about the ability to compromise, to negotiate. It goes to the very fundamentals of how we're going to relate in marriage."

Lisa Cohn and her husband, William Merkel, of Portland, Ore., have a blended family and find that the "his," "hers" and "ours" strategy works well for them. Cohn, 47, a freelance writer, has one child from an earlier marriage; Merkel, 59, a clinical psychologist, has two of his own; and the couple has one together.

The couple keeps separate accounts for their personal needs and their own kids, and a joint account for housing, maintenance, vacations and other family activities.

Cohn believes separate accounts have helped her family avoid the anger she's seen in others "when someone starts to feel angry about being asked to do too much or there are hassles from ex-spouses."

Roberta Carlton hates to balance her checkbook. So she's happy leaving management of the family accounts to her spouse, Nathaniel Hefferman, who is staying home with their two young sons.

Carlton, 39, vice president of the SparkSource Inc. public relations and marketing firm in Lexington, Mass., said their money system developed when she was pregnant with their first child.

"We decided to experiment with how it would work living off my salary, so we banked his salary," she recalled. "I started paying the bills and it was a shock. Two days after I got paid, there'd be no money left, and I kept thinking, how are we going to do this?"

There were several answers, she said. "We discovered that when we had a child, our lifestyles changed," Carlton said. "You don't go out to eat as much, for example."

Meanwhile, Hefferman took over the books, managing the separate checking account that she keeps as well as the household account.