By Bob Krauss
Advertiser Columnist

The state-of-the-art Kahala Nui retirement home out by Star of the Sea School received its first residents this past week. Arcadia, eat your heart out. Kahala Nui is a cross between an Outrigger Canoe Club and a Kahala Mandarin Resort for senior citizens.

Let us examine this evolution of lifestyle in Our Honolulu.

A media center, for watching the Super Bowl on a 61-inch flat TV screen, looks like the card room at the Pacific Club. The home is so big that the wings are named after the Hawaiian islands for identification so residents won't get lost. There's valet parking service and an in-house TV channel of resident activities.

I took the tour about a week ago when new residents with dazed expressions on their faces were checking out their apartments. "Awesome," said Emma Meyer. "Awesome," said Bob Kamins.

The closets in a two-bedroom apartment would comfortably house a family of three in Vietnam. The showers are built for wheelchair access. Two-hundred fifty pieces of art will be hung on the walls. In the healthcare unit for residents with disabilities, there's a parking lot for motorized wheelchairs next to the dining room.

People with Alzheimer's can put family photos and mementos in glass cases beside their doors so they'll remember where they live. They'll wear little beepers that will go off if they wander outside.

Chuck Swanson, 78, chairman of the board, explained: "You don't buy a unit, you buy healthcare. You make a refundable deposit that gives you a life-care agreement. Live here the rest of your life and you're taken care of. If you're taken out in a box, your heirs get 90 percent of the deposit back." Put another way, the main units are pampered playgrounds for affluent seniors who leave their worries behind.

The refundable deposit varies from about $350,000 to $850,000 depending on the unit you buy; a one-, two- or three-bedroom apartment ranges between 700 and 1,250 square feet of living space. In addition, there's a monthly fee that will just about use up your monthly retirement benefits.

From then on, you're home free. No lawn to mow; no electric bills. It's like living in a luxury hotel where everything is taken care of. There's a barber shop and beauty parlor. Take your parcel to the front desk and they'll send it by UPS or FedEx. The gourmet kitchen serves three meals a day in a formal and an informal dining room, or cook in your apartment.

There's a garden off the lobby with a fountain, a reading library next door, a computer room, terraces for privacy scattered all through the place, and party rooms where you can celebrate birthdays and anniversaries catered for your guests.

There's a swimming pool and exercise room, and each apartment is equipped with pull cords in case you fall down and can't reach the telephone. Pull a cord and security comes running.