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The Honolulu Advertiser

Posted on: Sunday, June 26, 2005

Family planning starts early for big reunions

By Zenaida Serrano
Advertiser Staff Writer

About 25 members of the Juan family got together last month to celebrate the descendants of Florendo Juan Sr. and his wife, Bienvenida, who both immigrated to Hawai'i from the Philippines more than 50 years ago.

Preparing for last weekend's reunion, Nagao family members — from left, Jean Nagao, Shann Peterson, 9-year-old Evan Nagao, 5-year-old Aidan Nagao and Priscilla Nagao — created a banner.

Rebecca Breyer • The Honolulu Advertiser

After several months of careful planning and e-mail updates, the Juans organized a four-day celebration that included dinner at Bravo, karaoke, a day at Hawaiian Waters Adventure Park and a beach barbecue in Waikiki.

And throughout each activity, family unity was a constant theme, said Vicky Followell, 50, of 'Aiea.

" 'The members of your family were given to you to help shape you' — this is our family mantra and motto that we have incorporated into our family reunion activities and have kept it close to our hearts since our first reunion," Followell said.

The Juans join hundreds of other Island 'ohana taking advantage of summer weather to celebrate family bonds, reconnections and cultural roots. The Advertiser asked readers to share with us their tips on planning the perfect family reunion. Common keys to success include early planning, constant communication and family-wide involvement.

Unlike the Juans, the Reeves 'ohana will celebrate its July 30 reunion in Kuli'ou'ou on a much larger scale. The Reeves family reunion evolved from a simple 21st birthday party; a laid-back gathering of 20 guests cooking on a hibachi and playing volleyball at Kuli'ou'ou Beach Park.

Thirteen years later, the once-humble affair has grown into an annual 500-guest bash nicknamed the Kuli'ou'olympics — complete with obstacle courses, doughnut-eating contests and water- balloon tosses, and handmade medals for winners.

The event draws descendants of Rose Miguel, Charles Reeves and their nine children, who began their lives together six generations ago in the east Honolulu valley.

"Despite the large number of people and seemingly sophisticated (planning) committee, the Kuli'ou'olympics is, above all, really just a chance to enjoy each other's company, catch up on the past year and honor our Reeves family heritage," said Keala Peters, a past reunion organizer.

Getting started

Illustration by Greg Taylor | The Honolulu Advertiser
One of the hardest things about planning a reunion is the very first step: getting in touch with family members near and far, then setting up a date and location for the festivities.

The Ramos family's last reunion was in 2003 at a rented cottage on Malaekahana Beach. Nearly 70 family members flew in from all parts of the state, California, Illinois and Michigan.

"Because we are a family of 13 siblings, we used the phone and e-mail profusely, and began planning at least two years in advance," said Bernice Ramos Clark, 51, of Makiki. One of her sisters became the designated planner, who issued official bulletins to update the entire clan.

The Rapozo family created a Web site devoted solely to their reunion next month, said organizer Alfred G. Costa, 72, of Kailua.

Guests can visit the site to register for the event or to get the latest updates, Costa said.

"I would hate to do all this through snail mail," Costa said, laughing. "It makes this so much easier."

Family members can also check out the site to learn more about the Rapozo history, see photos, read biographies and share memories, Costa said.

During the planning phase of the Reeves reunion, "newsletters are sent out ... and numerous meetings are held," said Peters, 35, of Kuli'ou'ou. The family set up subcommittees, including the food, games, awards and T-shirt committees, she said.

"Get as many people involved in the planning as possible," Peters said. "It's nice to get all the aunties, tutus and teenagers involved to make the event a reflection of all the generations."

That Clan-Do spirit

Shann Peterson of Liliha and Priscilla Nagao of Hawai'i Kai load boxes in Liliha on a Thursday afternoon for the next day's Nagao family reunion at Camp Erdman. Planning and supplies are key to a reunion.

Rebecca Breyer • The Honolulu Advertiser

Part of the fun of a reunion, aside from catching up with loved ones, is the many activities involved — from barbecues at the beach and karaoke nights to brunch buffets at five-star hotels and trips to Las Vegas.

Plan for activities and outings that everyone — young and old — can enjoy, Peters said.

At least 300 guests are expected at the Brown 'ohana reunion during the first weekend in July in Honolulu.

"This year the organizers have arranged three days of events, with a dinner on Friday and Saturday night and a picnic at the park on Sunday afternoon," said Toby Tamaye, 32, of Kapahulu.

The Brown reunion includes a golf tournament, Hawaiian-themed activities such as lei making and coconut weaving, and silent auctions, Tamaye said.

The Ching family will incorporate an adventure at sea into their reunion next month. "My dad, Edmund Ching, celebrated his 80th birthday this year and as a gift to his five married children and his 11 grandkids, he is organizing a cruise to Alaska," said Valerie Moss, 49, of Wai'alae Nui.

A total of 41 family members from Hawai'i, California, Colorado and Illinois will enjoy casino nights, kiddie activities and endless buffets on board the ship, as well as shore excursions in Juneau, Skagway and Ketchikan.

Cyndy Ning is also traveling for her reunion, but to a place with very special meaning to the entire family.

"This year the siblings are finally taking the pilgrimage to the homeland in honor of our parents," said Ning, an associate director of the Center for Chinese Studies at the University of Hawai'i.

Ning, her siblings and first cousins — about 30 family members from all parts of the United States — will travel to China this summer. They will meet first in Shanghai, where her parents met and were educated, then go to Fuzhou, where her father was born and where her grandparents are buried.

"For one of my brothers, now aged 58, this will be his first return to China since he left at the age of 4," Ning said.

Covering expenses

The descendents of 1917 immigrants Ikino and Tatsuji Nagao got souvenir T-shirts at the reunion: red for nissei (the second generation), blue for sansei (third), yellow for yonsei (fourth), and orange for gosei (fifth).

Nagao family photo

Once the basics are in place — when and where the reunion will be, food, accommodations, special outings, etc. — then costs can be figured out.

Members of the Rodrigues family, who celebrated their first reunion in February on the North Shore, rented an eight-bedroom beach house to accommodate about 25 guests. The total expenses for the four-day bash, which welcomed nearly 50 party-goers, came out to about $3,500. "Everyone split the cost evenly," said Davilyn Sato, 32, of Waialua.

Guests of the Ramos reunion also knew what they were expected to contribute right from the get-go.

"Expenses were spelled out clearly on the onset: Every sibling would contribute $150 each for their share of general expenses," Clark said.

When costs seem out of hand, especially for the larger-scale parties, some families fundraise.

Last month, nearly 200 guests attended the Puha family reunion, which included a stew dinner, a day at Hawaiian Waters Adventure Park and a picnic at a park with group games.

"Our family that lives here on O'ahu fundraised by selling lu'au plates throughout the year, snack packs and pre-packaged brownies," said Noelani Cobb-Adams, 25, of Pu'unui.

A year of fundraising netted the Puhas about $6,000, said Cobb-Adams, who organized the event.

"The money was used to print T-shirts for everyone in attendance, as well as pay for the main dishes at the stew dinner, and at the picnic, as well as the water park tickets and bento on Saturday," she said.

For smaller reunions in which family members will provide their own food and drinks, Followell suggests taking the time to hunt for bargains: Buy items in bulk from wholesale stores, or stock up whenever a supermarket advertises special deals.

Keepsakes for kin

Incorporating diversions or fun outings into the celebration is a must, but many reunion organizers also make it a priority to include some type of event keepsake for guests. Commemorative T-shirts and sun visors are among the most common reunion souvenirs.

Like the Puhas, the Browns will distribute T-shirts to attendees, but are also using the gathering as a way to pass traditions on to the younger generations.

"This year we have done something special by interviewing our elderly kupuna and creating a VHS/DVD for family members to cherish their Hawaiian roots," said Tamaye, a member of the Brown family.

The Rodrigues family's gift to guests is along the same lines.

"I paid for a photographer to take our family portrait at the reunion," said Sato, who organized the get-together.

The images were downloaded onto discs, which were distributed to family members, Sato said.

At Camp Nagao 2005 — a reunion held last weekend at YMCA Camp Erdman — 85 guests honored the descendants of Ikino and Tatsuji Nagao, who arrived in Hawai'i from Japan in 1917.

"We have created a family tree album for every family attending," said Priscilla Nagao, 43, of Hawai'i Kai.

The simple three-ring binder included pictures and biographies of family members, filled with "stories of hanabata days," Nagao said. Camp Nagao participants also received T-shirts color-coded by generation, and lanyards with nametags.

"At one reunion, we prepared a handmade quilt which had handprints and footprints of each grandchild in each square," said Clark, who attended the Ramos reunion two years ago.

But the best souvenirs are the memories, said Bonni Yee Reichelt of Brisbane, Australia.

Reichelt's mother and three sisters live on O'ahu. The Yee family's last family reunion was in 1997 on the Big Island, where family members enjoyed a low-key gathering with good food, games and stories.

"These family reunions were a wonderful opportunity to catch up with all members of the family across the generations," she said. "We learned about our family history, laughed over old childhood memories and created many more happy memories together."

• • •

Checklist for the family affair

• "Start planning early," said Davilyn Sato, 32, of Waialua. Preparing far in advance is the best way to nail down the dates and locations most convenient for everyone.

• "Communication would be the best piece of advice," said Valerie Moss, 49, of Wai'alae Nui. "Make sure everybody gets the same information and be prepared to repeat information over and over again."

• When considering activities or outings for the reunion, keep the interests of each generation in mind, said Toby Tamaye, 32, of Kapahulu. "And make sure the children are taken care of, because they're limited to doing what we create for them," he said.

• Make reunion souvenirs for guests, such as commemorative T-shirts, a family tree or photo album, said Priscilla Nagao, 43, of Hawai'i Kai. "It's neat to give everybody something to show what their roots are," Nagao said.

• "Keep it light and fun. No stress out!" said Vicky Followell, 50, of 'Aiea.


Get organized

A checklist to get started:

• Organize a reunion committee and subcommittees, and select a reunion chairperson.

• Create a planning binder to hold your information.

• Compile a list of family members, with addresses and other contact information.

• Mail a survey to family members for opinions and ideas.

• Select a reunion type, and date and duration for the event.

• Choose and reserve a location. Locate lodging for out-of-town guests.

• Create a budget. Plan fundraisers, if needed.

• Create and mail invitations.

• Select a liaison from each branch of the family for communications.

• Find out any special talents of family members (for food dishes, craft projects, entertainment, etc.); assign duties.

• Plan activities, games, entertainment and menu.

• Develop a schedule for the reunion.

• Send out a reminder.

Source: www.family-reunion.com


On the Web

Visit these sites for more reunion tips and ideas:

www.family-reunion.com

genealogy.about.com/od/family_reunions

www.familyreunion.com