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The Honolulu Advertiser
Posted on: Friday, December 8, 2006

STAGE REVIEW
MVT's 'Diaries' lightens up yule hustle, bustle

By Joseph T. Rozmiarek
Special to The Advertiser

Andrew Meader

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'SANTALAND DIARIES'

Manoa Valley Theatre

8 p.m today and tomorrow, 4 p.m. Sunday

$20, $15 seniors, military and those younger than 26

988-6131, www.manoavalleytheatre.com

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"SantaLand Diaries" is a tiny, unpretentious interlude — a one-man monologue on the Christmas season from the point of view of an out-of-work young man who lands a seasonal job as an elf at a Macy's store in New York City.

Playing just an hour, "Diaries" features Andrew Meader in a reprise of his 2005 performance at Manoa Valley Theatre. It's a peaceful time-out from the holiday bustle.

The script by David Sedaris is based on his personal experience and filled with moments of self-deprecating irony — the worst of which is being so down on his luck that he might even apply for the position. It was his reading of "The SantaLand Diaries" on National Public Radio's "Morning Edition" that established Sedaris as a talented satirist.

Watching all the "short people" and "the ones with the big ears and noses" being called first adds to David's indignity. He's given the elf name "Crumpet" and subjected to a week of training that includes team-building group cheers for Santa.

The effort involved in being "Crumpet" causes him to suggest a new name — Blisters — more dwarflike, but also more appropriate.

David works hard, ignores a fellow employee — a dwarf "coasting on her looks" and ultimately becomes "good by association." But not without a string of observations on parents and children seen under the pressure of Christmas shopping.

He's assigned to the "oh my God!" corner, where parents get their first glimpse of the hour-long line to talk to Santa, the vomit corner where a wall of glass encourages youngsters to lose their lunch, and the "Santa Window" where an elf must be of good cheer and encourage visitors to peek in.

When children tire of looking for Santa, Crumpet tells them to look for Cher instead.

Parents are especially demanding. Some complain about the ethnic Santas, demanding one that is more "traditional." When one unhappy parent threatens to have him fired, Crumpet snaps back, "I can have you killed!"

This may have led to David's realization that "Santa" is an anagram for "Satan."

Meader gives the material a laid-back feel and an understated delivery, lounging dejectedly on Santa's throne or sitting tiredly on the huge gift boxes that fill out Karen Archibald's set design. It seems that the cost of being a perky elf with a pasted-on smile is paid out in negative mood swings.

Costumed in candy-cane-striped leggings, green smock, and a ridiculous elf hat, Crumpet is a walking contradiction and a dose of reality in a season that can become too high on its own sugar or swamped in seasonal political correctness.