Ellen Parker knew Erick Hjortsvang enough to be able to pronounce his last name (YORTS-vang), but that was about it.

They met in March 2001 at a hospital in Oklahoma City, where Parker was a surgery intern and Hjortsvang was a resident in a different department.

"The first time we met, she was a poor, beleaguered intern getting worked by her attendings," said Hjortsvang, 39, whose mom is from Waipahu but grew up in Martinez, Calif.

Though they worked together and shared mutual friends, they never hung out socially.

Then, in February 2002, Parker was invited by a friend to get drinks at a local trattoria.

It was a Tuesday, Parker remembered. "Not a go-out night," she said, laughing.

She wasn't expecting to meet anyone. Neither was Hjortsvang, who was invited by the same group of friends.

They had no idea they were being set up.

"I started to realize it when my friend, who was sitting next to him, got up and told me to sit there," said Parker, 33.

The two really hit it off.

As often happens when two people are set up by friends, Parker and Hjortsvang were left alone. Their friends had disappeared.

So the two went to another bar, talking and getting to know each other outside their workplace.

He took her home and kissed her goodnight.

"He was just really laid-back," Parker said. "And he had a great good sense of humor."

They continued seeing each other, hanging out during and after work most days of the week. They liked to go to dinner, watch movies and go on gallery walks in town.

Within a couple of weeks, their relationship had become serious.

"It was nice being with someone who understands what's going on at work," Parker said. "You don't have to explain it. He understands."

But that summer, Hjortsvang was leaving Oklahoma City to take a yearlong fellowship in San Francisco. Parker still had another year at the hospital in Oklahoma City.

Though they were only dating for five months, they decided to stay together despite the distance.

For a year they flew back and forth, chatted on cell phones and e-mailed each other. They met up on trips, once to Hawai'i to visit Hjortsvang's family.

"It was rough," Parker said. "We racked up a lot of frequent-flier miles."

Hjortsvang returned to Oklahoma City in July 2003. By this point, he said, he knew he was going to marry Parker.

"(The distance) really strengthened our relationship," he said. "It defined the person I wanted to be with."

They moved into a two-bedroom flat and started talking about marriage.

Living together, they said, taught them a lot more about each other. They discovered they both play piano — Parker likes the classics, while Hjortsvang prefers jazz — and one is more organized than the other.

"It was challenging," Parker said, smiling.

The following summer, in 2004, the couple started looking at engagement rings.

Though they had discussed marriage, there wasn't any proposal. And Parker was getting antsy.

One day she came home after a stressful day at work.

"She came home really mad and starting asking, 'Where are we going with this relationship?'" Hjortsvang said. "It was a meltdown."

That's when Hjortsvang had to spoil the surprise.

He told her that he was waiting for her parents to arrive in two weeks to ask for their permission before proposing.

So when she finally got the ring in the mail in October, it wasn't much of a surprise. Hjortsvang asked her to marry him, she said yes, put the ring on and went to sleep.

"It wasn't romantic," Parker said, laughing.

The couple decided to get married on O'ahu, where most of Hjortsvang's family still lived.

They hired a local wedding coordinator, Mona Hirata, to help with the long-distance planning.

"It's hard to do when you're 4,500 miles away and working 80 to 90 hours a week," Parker said.

They exchanged vows on Oct. 4, 2005, at the Halekulani hotel in front of 60 guests.

Parker chose her younger brother to be her best man.

The couple honeymooned at the Turtle Bay Resort, even running into Owen Wilson and Kate Hudson, who were in town filming "You, Me and Dupree."

The couple recently moved to San Francisco. Parker has a fellowship in neuroradiology; Hjortsvang works in hematology/oncology.

The hardest part about marriage so far is finding time to spend together.

Because, they said, that's also the best part.

"The long and short of it: I'm happier now," Hjortsvang said. "I really look forward to going home."

Reach Catherine E. Toth at ctoth@honoluluadvertiser.com.