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The Honolulu Advertiser
Posted on: Friday, February 24, 2006

His mental illness left pals wary

By Tara Solomon

Dear Advice Diva:

I suffered from mental illness for most of last year. I have now recovered, but some of my friends are still wary.

In particular, one friend, who actually helped me a lot in managing my disorder, now refuses to even acknowledge that I exist, even though I am totally a new man.

Is this an understandable and fair reaction, or not? And how can I go about talking to my friends who are still on their guard? What can I do to tell them that I'm not who I used to be?

—Wanting to Start Over

Dear Wanting:

If there were ever a time to stop dwelling on the past, it is now.

You were strong enough to get over a rough patch in your life, and you are strong enough to create a positive environment for yourself, including forging new friendships.

This is not to say that your old friends won't someday come around, but for the time being, they want some space. Understandable? Yes. Fair? Not necessarily, but don't hold that against them.

You have a lot to celebrate these days; let your happiness radiate and you won't be alone for long.

The Advice Diva welcomes your questions — particularly the more amusing ones. Write her at advicediva@miamiherald.com.