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The Honolulu Advertiser
Posted on: Sunday, March 5, 2006

They met amid cadavers; the next step was love

By Catherine E. Toth
Advertiser Staff Writer

Right: A Father’s day photo taken last June 18 of Wade and Cecile. The kids, from left, are Chloe, 11; Calais, 7; and Claire, 9.

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Cecile Sebastian and Wade Nobuhara married on Aug. 1, 1992, in San Francisco.

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Cecile Sebastian was a freshman at Northwestern University's dental school. It was 1985. One day, Wade Nobuhara, a strapping sophomore, walked into her anatomy lab.

Despite the cadavers and permeating smell of formaldehyde, it was love at first sight — for one of them.

"He was just so cute," said Sebastian, 42, now a downtown dentist and mother of three. "It was purely carnal desire!"

Nobuhara, on the other hand, didn't notice her. He'd come in to talk to a classmate, and he was too immersed in studying to think about dating.

Sebastian asked around to get more information. She found out Nobuhara was the sophomore class president, from Hawai'i, very smart and quiet — and unattached.

It turned out that one of her close friends was a neighbor of his in the dorms. So the two plotted "chance" encounters. That was the start of a nearly two-year campaign to win Nobuhara's heart.

Whenever Nobuhara went out for a run along Lake Shore Drive in Chicago, Sebastian would get a call. She'd put on her shoes and run along the lake as well, hoping she'd run into him.

When Nobuhara would see her running, he'd stop and talk.

"I'd wonder, 'What a coincidence,' " said Nobuhara, 44, now an endodontist with Endodontic Specialists Inc. "I was totally clueless."

Funny, Sebastian said — since everyone in the dental school and dorms knew about her infatuation.

Classmates nicknamed her Cloud Nine, which was where she floated whenever Nobuhara was around.

The next summer, in 1986, Sebastian organized a formal for the dental school. Engrossed in the planning, she hadn't secured a date for herself.

Worried that her mother would set her up — she was threatening to! — Sebastian decided to gather up the courage and ask Nobuhara to be her date.

She found his number in the school directory and called him.

"It was really out of the blue," Nobuhara said. "I didn't even know anything about a formal."

He agreed to go, and even sent a bouquet of pink roses ahead of time to her dorm room.

They were among 162 students and instructors who attended the formal, held on a boat in Lake Michigan. They had a great time, talking and dancing on the three-hour cruise.

At the end of the night, their friends wanted to continue the party at a nearby nightclub. Nobuhara and Sebastian jumped in a taxi and headed to the club, where they danced for another few hours before heading back to the dorms. The date ended with a small kiss on the lips.

Sebastian thought that was a good sign.

But then he never called.

She sent him a card, thanking him for the roses. He responded, thanking her for the evening but not asking her out again. (Nobuhara had wanted to, but he was too shy.)

Sebastian was undaunted. She got her friends to organize outings in the city and invite Nobuhara.

By the end of the summer, they were hanging out alone, having picnics in the park or trying new restaurants for dinner. On Sundays they took advantage of the city's all-day bus pass and ventured around Chicago.

By September they were officially a couple.

Though different — she's outgoing and he's shy; she's a risk-taker and he's a planner — they found they had more in common than they thought.

"I liked the fact that he appreciated the arts like I did," Sebastian said. "I like that he could listen to the symphony or watch a ballet or go dancing."

The pair dated exclusively until 1988, when Nobuhara graduated from dental school.

Since Sebastian had another year at Northwestern and Nobuhara was moving back to O'ahu, the two decided to stay committed despite the distance.

Though Sebastian had hoped for an engagement ring, she knew the wait would be worthwhile.

"We knew this was the real thing," Sebastian said. "We were both in this for the long run."

They wrote to each other nearly every day for the next four years, visiting as often as they could.

On one of those visits to Hawai'i, about two years into their long-distance relationship, Nobuhara decided to make the commitment official.

Sebastian, who was born in the Philippines and lived in San Francisco, had always wanted to walk on a moonlit beach in Hawai'i.

But on every visit to the Islands, Nobuhara never took her.

Then after dinner at the Sheraton Moana Surfrider in 1990, Nobuhara asked if she wanted to walk along Kuhio Beach.

To his surprise, Sebastian said no.

"I told him, 'Not in these stockings!' " she said, laughing.

Instead, Nobuhara took Sebastian to a lookout on Tantalus. Sitting in the car, he took out an engagement ring and proposed.

"I was just happy to be together, since that was one of the few days we were together," Sebastian said. "So (the proposal) was the icing on the cake."

The couple married on Aug. 1, 1992 — six years to the day after their first date at the formal — at Old St. Mary's Cathedral in San Francisco. Their reception, which hosted about 200 guests, was held at the InterContinental Mark Hopkins hotel in Nob Hill.

Two weeks later, the couple moved in with Nobuhara's parents in Wai'alae. He worked as an endodontist; a few months later, Sebastian began working as a dentist.

In December 1994, the couple had their first child, Chloe. Two years later, they welcomed a second daughter, Claire. And in 1999, Calais was born.

Today, Sebastian has her own practice. Nobuhara still works as an endodontist. The family lives in 'Aina Haina.

Finding time together can be challenging with three daughters. So last year, the couple scheduled Fridays off. They start their mornings with breakfast and go over their schedules together before running errands.

"That's the best thing we ever did," Nobuhara said.

Though busy with kids, they still manage to find time for dinner dates, which often end with dancing at a nightclub. "But it has to be a place that has a retro night," Nobuhara said, laughing.

Married for 14 years, the couple can't say that marriage is easy. It does take effort. And they have more than 2,500 love letters over four years to prove it.

"For us, the success of our marriage is love, faith and trust," Sebastian said. "And a lot of prayer."

Reach Catherine E. Toth at ctoth@honoluluadvertiser.com.