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The Honolulu Advertiser
Posted on: Sunday, September 3, 2006

Commitment wins his bride even when Navy calls shots

By Catherine E. Toth
Advertiser Staff Writer

Kristine Misola was Radford High School's 1994 homecoming queen, and Paul De Soto was her date.

1994

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The couple welcome Adam at Tripler Army Medical Center/Hospital.

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Back in October 1994, Kristine Misola didn't have a date for the homecoming dance at Radford High School — and she was the homecoming queen!

In desperation, she begged her good friend to help her. The friend gave Misola a few numbers to call.

Luckily for Paul De Soto Jr., the first guy Misola called wasn't home. De Soto was the second.

"I liked that he was polite and respectful," said Misola, now 28 and a lieutenant in the Navy stationed at Pearl Harbor. "He was very considerate. And he was nice to my parents."

Misola and De Soto had met once, two years earlier, when De Soto had gone to the homecoming dance with Misola's friend — the one who set them up. But they only vaguely remembered each other.

"I just remember him being very quiet," she said.

That was exactly opposite of the outgoing and opinionated Misola, yet, the two got along surprisingly well. So well, in fact, that De Soto boldly told her the night of the dance: "We're going to be together for a long time."

But soon after that first date, De Soto, who had enlisted in the Hawai'i National Guard, went to basic training for four months in Oklahoma. He wrote Misola at least once a week, sending gifts whenever he could.

Misola, however, was worried that the relationship was getting too serious, too fast.

And when she was accepted to Penn State University that December, she was sure it wouldn't last.

De Soto was persistent about staying together, telling her he felt it wasn't over yet.

In January 1996, five months after Misola left for Pennsylvania, he enrolled at a nearby college.

"I didn't think he'd go that far," Misola said, laughing.

"Part of me going was to continue school," said De Soto, now 31, who wound up earning a biological science degree from Penn State. "If I went as a student, I'd show her that I was serious about this. ... I just knew it wasn't over yet."

Misola graduated with a degree in computer science in 1999 and was commissioned as an officer in the Navy. She went to Newport, R.I., to learn how to navigate and drive naval vessels.

De Soto had another semester left at school. For those remaining months, they e-mailed, called and saw each other on weekends.

She finished her training and he graduated around the same time. Now committed to making the relationship work, they both left for Everett, Wash., where Misola was reporting to work on a destroyer.

They lived there for two years, making it through a six-month deployment — they bought a Labrador to keep De Soto company — and Seattle's cold winters.

On Oct. 13, 2001, two days before their seventh anniversary, De Soto proposed at the top of the Seattle Space Needle.

"I had made reservations at the restaurant for the next day, a nice window-side seat, but I was so excited, I couldn't wait," De Soto said, smiling.

The next year the couple moved to Charleston, S.C., where Misola attended naval nuclear propulsion training. Not wanting to fail, she'd often spend 15 hours a day at school to keep up with the high-level math, physics and chemistry she was learning. De Soto was supportive, doing household chores and bringing her dinner at school, all while working full time as a research assistant at the Medical University of South Carolina.

"I was not surprised that he did all of this; he has always been a thoughtful person," Misola said. "But I realized during that experience that I would be marrying my best friend, someone I knew I could count on when I was at my lowest point, and during the hardest times."

There were no doubts after that. On March 28, 2003, the couple exchanged vows in front of 150 guests at the Fort DeRussy Chapel with a reception at the Hale Koa Hotel.

Soon after the wedding, the newlyweds headed to San Diego, where Misola was stationed aboard an aircraft carrier.

In between another deployment and jobs, they travelled to Mexico, San Francisco and Las Vegas. They bought a house in San Diego. But Hawai'i kept calling them home.

In April 2005, Misola accepted an assignment to Pearl Harbor. De Soto got a job working as a safety coordinator for the University of Hawai'i's John A. Burns School of Medicine. They now live in Salt Lake.

In June, the couple welcomed son Adam, born at Tripler Army Medical Center. He's the first grandson on both sides of their families.

"In our time together, Paul has taught me that real love knows no boundaries," Misola said. "And sometimes, to experience true love, you have to take a chance."

Reach Catherine E. Toth at ctoth@honoluluadvertiser.com.