In my estimation, the American Academy of Pediatrics has a recent history of taking very "soft" stands on parenting issues, if they take a stand at all. In the July 2006 issue of AAP News, senior editor Carla Kemp wrote a column titled "Behavior Management 101: Beyond time-out" in which she shared advice from various behavioral pediatricians on managing aggression in young children. Turns out the AAP and I hardly agree on the definition of "beyond."

One recommendation for handling a child who aggresses against other children is to tell the child the rule (no biting), redirect (ask, "Are your feet for kicking or walking?"), promote empathy (ask, "How do you think Johnny felt when you kicked him?"), and role play by helping the child act out what to do the next time he finds himself in the same situation.

Hello? This is an example of what I call "Yada-Yada Discipline" — the attempt to talk and cajole a child out of misbehaving. It is generally ineffective, but as regards aggressive children, it's the equivalent of trying to stop a charging elephant with a fly swatter.

Another pediatrician favored using a system in which the offending child receives a mark on his hand every time the parent or teacher sees him doing something appropriate. When the child has a certain number of marks, he gets a treat. The problem with this is that aggressive children quickly figure out that the way to keep getting treated (no pun intended) as special cases is to keep hurting other children.

But before using positive reinforcement, says this same pediatric "expert," it's important to try to figure out what is causing the aggression. I know the answer to that. Aggressive children possess, by varying degrees, an entitlement mentality: They believe that what they want, they deserve to have; the ends justify the means; and no one has a right to stand in their way. Only powerful discipline that is truly "beyond time-out" will dislodge that mentality from a child.

The problem here is that pediatricians are the first people most parents go to with discipline problems. In fact, most pediatricians these days are dealing with more questions about behavioral issues than medical issues. Unfortunately, pediatricians receive little competent training in either medical school or their residencies in child behavior and child development. I fault the AAP for making a bad situation even worse.

"So, Mr. Smarty-Pants Parenting Expert," the AAP might retort, "how would you recommend dealing with aggressive children?"

Unfortunately, I'm out of space, but I'll take on that question next week, at which time I'll relate true stories of aggressive children who were cured in no time at all with truly "beyond time-out."