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The Honolulu Advertiser
Posted on: Tuesday, May 22, 2007

ABOUT WOMEN
At least the turmoil is predictable

By Treena Shapiro
Advertiser Columnist

It's hard to write a column when I'm preoccupied with trying to restrain my inner witch.

Few topics can transcend that thorny barrier of self-doubt and general loathing that surrounds me every four weeks or so. Naturally, every other month, my deadline for this column pops up just as my negativity is reaching its peak.

Bored by my periodic whining about this problem — and mildly concerned I might get myself fired or fire bombed — someone suggested that I write about my monthly mood swings. He aptly noted that they're a pretty common complaint among women. (I suspect the subtext of his suggestion is that they're an equally common complaint among the men who coexist with them).

Fair enough.

As it turns out, the National Women's Health Information Center reports that 25 percent of women don't suffer from pre-menstrual syndrome. If you're one of the blessed ones, move along. (Sorry, for some reason, I'm feeling a bit cranky).

For the rest of us, like it or not, we can expect that a few days of every month might find us extra irritable, anxious, depressed or insecure.

Sometimes we breeze through without noticing, or at least without anyone else noticing.

Other months, we spin through emotional states at a mind-blowing pace, leaving those around us unsure whether to break out the Ben & Jerry's or run for the hills. (Best bet: Do both, but bring your cell phone just in case).

PMS is definitely a pain — literally and figuratively — but think how much stronger it makes us for being able to survive it month after month after month after month.

Those who think that women are too emotional, too hormonal, to wield real power have no idea how vigorously we exercise our self-control on a regular basis. That's why we don't hit the people who dare question our stability. (Kidding!)

Seriously, though, think about it. Those who think women are too mean, too bossy or too sensitive during that time of month don't realize how self-disciplined we really are.

We bite our tongues instead of biting off people's heads.

We walk away from fights instead of charging in.

We go to work, even when facing the world seems like torture.

We bypass the ice cream aisle and head to the yogurt and fresh fruit.

We resist making hasty decisions and wait until our emotions are back in check to figure things out.

We don't always succeed. There are times we can't hold back the tears, can't deal with the stress and can't turn our frowns upside down.

But we aren't the only ones. Don't men also overreact and lose tempers? Don't they show poor impulse control? Don't their hormones sometimes take over?

At least women have a regularly scheduled time to learn how to deal with it.

Reach Treena Shapiro at tshapiro@honoluluadvertiser.com. Read her daily blog at blogs.honoluluadvertiser.com.