Members of the Kalihi Micronesian community stood outside the funeral of an 18-year-old Samoan yesterday and begged forgiveness from the teen's family.

In Samoan tradition, the ritual apology is called ifoga, but this was the Micronesian community following Samoan customs in an earnest effort of reconciliation following a crime that has broken hearts and strained community relations.

"We want to show you that we are with you," Pastor Sekap Esah said to the grieving relatives and friends. He stood in the parking lot of Moanalua Mortuary with members of his parish behind him. "Words are not enough just to stand here and say that we are so sorry."

Just after midnight on Dec. 26, 18-year-old Fusitogamala Iosefa Savea was stabbed in the heart outside Sunny's Market near Kuhio Park Terrace housing complex. A week later, 23-year-old RJ Ham was arrested and charged with the murder. Ham, who is Chuukese, is being held in lieu of $1 million bail.

Savea's death has all the marks of a tragedy, a young life suddenly, senselessly snuffed out.

He had just come to Hawai'i a few months ago, a young man starting his adult life. The stabbing happened on Christmas, midnight on Dec. 26, after Savea had celebrated the holiday with his cousins. It didn't happen in a fight. By witness accounts, it was an unprovoked attack. It is the kind of thing that can make a close-knit community boil and turn the anguish of grief into thoughts of revenge.

Pastor To'o Paogofie of the Samoan Council of the United Church of Christ called a meeting of his friends and fellow pastors in the Samoan and Micronesian communities. He said it was time to be more than spiritual leaders, they had to be civic leaders. The ifoga ritual was agreed upon and worked out last week and presented yesterday at Savea's funeral.

"What happened happened," Paogofie said. "This is for reconciliation and closure."

In the Samoan tradition, an ifoga is a ritualized formal apology where those seeking forgiveness humble themselves before the person or family that was hurt. An ifoga can take days. Those seeking forgiveness may have to wait in the hot sun or through the rainy night and there is no guarantee that the apology will be accepted. There is no guarantee there won't be retaliation on the spot.

If the matter is very serious, the high chief from the village of the accused would perform the ifoga.

It is a very humbling gesture on the part of those asking for mercy.

"We want to show you that we are with you," Esah said to Savea's family on behalf of the Micronesian community. "Life is so precious. Words cannot express how much we feel about what happened. We are very, very, very, very sorry. And we will keep praying for you."

CONNECTING IN RITUAL

An envelope of money collected from among the community was offered as part of the ifoga, as well as an 'ie toga, a fine mat, considered the most significant and sincere part of the ifoga ritual.

Savea's great-uncle Matuaiala Malivao, a chief from Samoa, accepted the apology on behalf of Savea's family. Savea's relatives had called for peace and forgiveness after his death.

Today, his body is being taken home to his parents for burial in American Samoa.

Family members of the accused did not attend the ifoga, which is considered separate and unrelated to any judicial proceedings or legal statements of guilt.

In the middle of the ceremony, a young man, a friend of the teen who was killed, roared up to the crowd in his pickup truck and stopped cold in the middle of the parking lot, blocking any entrance or exit.

There was a moment of tension among the crowd as he jumped out of the truck with an air of aggression, but he took his place among the mourners and was comforted by a young woman who wiped at his tears as well as her own.

FOR SAVEA

In the small chapel room inside Moanalua Mortuary, cousins stood around the white coffin holding Savea's body. They wore shirts with his handsome face airbrushed on the front and his name, birth date and the date of his death printed on the back. Cousin Ceenah Malivao softly stroked his hair and sobbed into the lace veil draped over the coffin lid. A grandmother lifted a small boy to place a pink rose on Savea's hands.

It is the kind of heartbreaking scene that could lead to more violence, but the UCC pastors believe that the earnest expression of regret and the grace of forgiveness will do much to bring healing and peace.

Reach Lee Cataluna at lcataluna@honoluluadvertiser.com.