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The Honolulu Advertiser
Posted on: Wednesday, January 23, 2008

Big-time transition to a big-girl bed

By Angie Wagner
For The Associated Press

Hawaii news photo - The Honolulu Advertiser

AP ILLUSTRATION | Siobhan Dooley

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LAS VEGAS, Nev. — On a routine evening, I put my 2-year-old into her crib to sleep and settled into my own bed to devour the book I've been trying to read for six months.

Then, all of a sudden, a sound startled me. What was it? Something small, mouse-like.

It was my 2-year-old's voice, " "Hi Mommy!"

She was standing in my bedroom. She had climbed out of her crib, a day we knew would come but dreaded all the same.

We put her back into her crib, where she demonstrated her gymnastics feat with glee.

I had figured I could hold off Aubrey for another month or two, but she had other plans.

So for the night, we put the crib mattress on the floor so she wouldn't hurt herself, and put up a gate in the doorway. But a bit later, there was that little voice again.

She had scaled the gate, something my 4-year-old can't do!

But here was Aubrey, out and about and realizing that something actually goes on in this house after she goes to bed. Could it be fun? She definitely didn't want to miss out.

So my husband and I put her down again and again, then she'd pop up and roam the house in the dark. She went from room to room and announced her presence with a giggle.

I pretended I was asleep. See? See how it's done? Finally, she was tired enough that she surrendered.

The next day we decided to buy the big-girl bed, a shopping trip with a bit of sadness because it meant we will no longer have a crib in our house. No more babies.

Elizabeth Pantley, author of the "No Cry Sleep Solution for Toddlers & Preschoolers," said making this transition is different for each child, but if the baby is climbing out of the crib like Aubrey, now is the time to make the move. Otherwise, she suggests waiting as long as possible. Typically, children make the move between their first and third birthdays.

"Switching to a bed gives a child a tremendous amount of freedom, and brings new issues for parents to deal with, such as the yo-yo syndrome (into bed, out of bed, into bed ...) or early morning wanderings," she said.

First task for us: the nap.

Our older daughter took to her big-girl bed the first day. Could we get as lucky this time?

Uh, no.

Aubrey kept getting up and either climbing over the gate or just whining at it.

My husband wanted to know what was going on, but I told him I was trying a trick I saw on "Super Nanny" once.

Every time she got up from the bed, I put her right back in it. Repeatedly, I returned her to the big-girl bed. She fought it, but I decided I was winning this battle.

Almost an hour later, there was sweet silence. I cracked the door open and saw that she fell asleep perched on the small ottoman to her glider. She was in the frog position.

So much for the new bed. I moved her into it anyway.

Pantley said parents should think through the details of a big-kid bed. Make sure there are no other events or big changes coming up soon such as beginning daycare or weaning off the bottle. Think about the type of bed (toddler bed or regular bed), the location of it and what kind of bedding you will use.

Evening came for us and I was ready for another round. I WILL win, I told myself. That night, it only took a few tries until she submitted.

Victory was mine.

Pantley said parents should have a consistent bedtime routine with the last 15 minutes or more occurring with the child in his bed. Read books, tell stories, and if the child wanders out of bed, take him back.

I am happy to report it has now been one week and Aubrey has slept in her bed every night. We make a big deal out of her having her own bed now and tell her what a big girl she is, something Pantley supports. Aubrey enjoys reading books in her rocker before lights out, then she eagerly climbs into her bed.

I can't say she hasn't gotten up a few times, but the tantrums and crying have subsided. One day she refused the nap altogether, but I'm proud of myself for sticking to the plan.

And, if luck is on my side, I might even start getting some better sleep.