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The Honolulu Advertiser
Posted on: Monday, March 3, 2008

ABOUT WOMEN
Vacation? No, it's a liberation

By Treena Shapiro
Advertiser Columnist

Last Monday I had to duck into a clothing store on the way to the office because I hadn't managed to find time over the weekend to tackle all my laundry, or even shop, for that matter.

As I paid for my purchases, it occurred to me that I needed to slow down and smell the detergent.

The thought occurred to me again a few hours later when a co-worker commented on the new blouse. My first reaction? Paranoia. Once I assured myself I didn't have any telltale price tags dangling, I clenched my teeth to avoid launching into a detailed rant about why I'd had to buy new clothes in the first place.

My jaw trembled with the effort to hold it all in.

Admittedly, the jaw thing might have had something to do with the pot of coffee I'd tanked to get myself through the day — but it was also another indication that I wasn't going to be able to maintain my sleep-deprived and over-caffeinated state much longer. I may thrive on stress, but I have a limit and I was pushing it.

That evening I did laundry.

The next evening, I cleared the decks and took a nap. Then I got up and started making vacation plans.

Nervous breakdown averted.

For me, this vacation represents more of a departure than the usual Mainland trip. It may look like a run-of-the-mill family vacation, but for this working mom of two, it's liberation.

It's a huge step for me to convince myself I'm allowed to take a trip just for fun. My friends do it all the time. I just admire their photos.

Although I love planning trips, I always stop short of booking them unless I have a legitimate reason.

Taking a vacation to escape is an indulgence I usually can't afford. As a result, I end up approaching getaways the way I do everything else: I multitask and end up cramming too many activities into too little time.

Needless to say, vacations are infrequent and rarely relaxing.

This time, though, it was easy to convince myself that I'd earned a real break.

I'd certainly earned the frequent-flier miles that are paying for our plane tickets. Anyone who doesn't believe retail therapy equals relaxation needs to get a mileage debit card.

Those ridiculously long work hours that felt unmanageable at the time seemed totally worth it when I realized how much they helped offset the rest of the vacation expenses.

I'm still feeling the urge to pack in too much sightseeing, but I'll find some downtime. If nothing else, I've got about 10 hours of flight time to relax.

Reach Treena Shapiro at tshapiro@honoluluadvertiser.com. Read her daily blog at blogs.honoluluadvertiser.com.