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The Honolulu Advertiser
Posted on: Sunday, March 23, 2008

Grandma keeps family together

By Monica Quock Chan

Back when William Taft was president, the Model T had recently been introduced, and world war was not yet a term, my paternal grandmother was born. The year was 1913, and her immigrant parents would welcome the firstborn of a bevy of siblings into their living quarters above a Chinatown restaurant in the Bay Area.

After residing in both the U.S. and China, the bright student would leave high school and at age 19 marry a gregarious, handy and hard-working fellow. During tough times in the future, he would hold down three jobs at once to meet his family's needs. The couple would be faithfully married for more than 50 years before he passed away from cancer.

It was not an easy life, but there were certainly joys along the way. Fluent in both Cantonese and English, my grandmother would be able to function well in both communities. While avidly keeping up with current events in China, she would at the same time become a lifelong Oakland A's fan. Most memorable would be celebrating the birth of her own children; decades later, grandchildren; and eventually great-grandchildren.

"Good Ol' Granny," as we fondly call her, turned 95 last month, her long life due perhaps in part to certain exceptional traits.

Paramount in my tutu's eyes is certainly her 'ohana. When younger, she selflessly acted as substitute mother for several of my dad's cousins. Even to this day, my grandma covets family proximity.

Her daughter and son-in-law live next door, my parents are 20 minutes away, and all grandchildren except me live in the same state. She has resignedly nicknamed her only granddaughter, who has lived in five states and traveled to 55 countries, a bird.

The family prioritizing has worked, however. With Good Ol' Granny as the hub, to this day most of the relatives keep in touch despite their busy, varied lives. Even this bird visits, calls and writes regularly.

A woman of discipline, my tutu sticks to eating healthy, and drinks only water. In her 80s, she was still using a rowing machine. Although exercise is no longer easy, she continues to enjoy walking and recently imitated our dancing toddler in a surprisingly agile burst of energy.

My grandmother's hearing remains sharp; her mind is sharper. Reading is a favorite pastime. Her beloved knitting is now difficult, but she continues to show interest in a variety of subjects. In her 70s, way beyond the age when most people tackle foreign language learning, she tried out a Mandarin class.

A look around my grandma's house reveals a lifestyle of simplicity; little clutter and few decorative items save for the prominently placed family portraits. Thoughtful and caring, she gives generously to others.

Good Ol' Granny is widely regarded as the family matriarch, and not just because of her seniority. There is an air of fortitude about her, a perseverance that has carried her through the tragedies and joys of nearly a century, and greatly influenced her 'ohana.

In elementary school, I wrote a piece for the local newspaper about how my grandmother was my heroine. Thank you, Good Ol' Granny, for continuing to be my inspiration and role model.

Monica Quock Chan is a freelance writer who lives in Honolulu with her husband and daughter.

Reach Monica Quock Chan at islandlife@honoluluadvertiser.com.