Friends and family members last night gathered to remember Clare Silva, the spunky, warmhearted association president at the Punchbowl Homes housing project who was fatally shot on Easter morning in her apartment.

Father Gregory Johnson, Silva's priest, told the more than 50 people who gathered for the memorial service that "as shocking as Clare's murder remains for each of us, we are called today to collect our thoughts long enough to give thanks for what Clare meant to us and what Clare still means to us."

Johnson then began singing "Amazing Grace," which he said was one of Silva's favorite songs, and the attendees joined in.

Silva's daughter, Tyffny Riordan, attended the service and wrote a short statement that was read by her husband. The statement touched briefly on Melvin Yoshida, a 70-year-old tenant at Punchbowl Homes accused of fatally shooting Silva on April 12. "She tried to see the good in Mel and wanted to be his friend," Riordan said in her statement. "My mom's heart was bigger than she was."

Silva, 54, was killed about 11:20 a.m. at the 156-unit state public housing project at 730 Captain Cook Ave. Police said Silva was on the phone with her sister-in-law on the Mainland when she heard a "banging" on the door, and went to answer it. After a brief argument, she was shot in the abdomen, police said.

Yoshida, who neighbors say had a romantic interest in Silva, has been charged with second-degree murder.

Silva was a disabled grandmother of three with a daughter, Riordan, in the Navy.

Friends described her as a staunch community advocate.

She was president of the Punchbowl Homes residents' association and the block captain for the community policing program. In 2007, she led a group of 50 residents who held signs in front of their building to call for drivers to slow down. Silva also often put together gatherings for tenants at the building, spearheaded the opening of a thrift shop and opened an activity room.

Police Sgt. Larry Santos, with the community police program, said he met Silva a year ago and was drawn to her positive attitude and drive to help her community. "As a police officer, I'm supposed to be tough, not show emotion," he said. "Not today. Clare was one of our biggest supporters."

The hour-long service was held in a grassy area behind Punchbowl Homes, which is a state-funded development for seniors and the disabled. Many of those who attended were Silva's neighbors, who said she was always looking for ways to brighten someone else's day or better her community.

Shawn Canon, 60, met Silva when his mother lived at Punchbowl Homes before she died last year. He attended the service yesterday, he said, because Silva helped his mother "in many infinitesimal ways."

He added, "She was always helping others."