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The Honolulu Advertiser
Posted on: Monday, November 16, 2009

Couples working from home should set boundaries


By Anita Bruzzese

Actress Bette Davis once said that the key to a successful marriage was separate bathrooms.

For Scot and Kate Herrick, it's headphones.

The Bellevue, Wash., couple have both been working from home since March. She likes to listen to heavy metal music while working. He usually likes instrumentals. They have found marital and professional harmony by using headphones, their iPods delivering the music they each favor.

It's just one of the many ways the couple, who both once worked for Washington Mutual, have found to share domestic and professional spaces. They both also have separate work areas.

"We've found ways not to get on each other's nerves," says Scot, owner of CubeRules.com, an online career management site.

The recession has had a lot of impact on American lives, and one of those areas has been that many couples have found themselves spending more time together because of job loss, career change — or because they've launched businesses from home like the Herricks.

And like the Herricks, many couples are trying to work out the kinks of being together 24/7.

"I love my husband dearly," Kate says, "but he likes it so quiet that this house is like a museum."

Despite their different working styles, the Herricks say they've managed to develop a system that works for them professionally and personally. They recommend other couples wanting to do the same should:

Respect the work. Just as you wouldn't interrupt a colleague unnecessarily, the same should be true of a partner at home. It's best to have separate work spaces with required office equipment, but if that's not possible, it's even more important to be sensitive to the other person's work style.

Have regular meetings. The Herricks say they discuss their work schedules every day. While they each have cell phones for business, they like to use the home land line for conference calls, so coordinated schedules make sure there isn't a conflict.

Set terms. Couples need to agree on household duties, and when they will be done. For the Herricks, they live by the schedule they established when both were working outside the home and don't begin household tasks such as laundry until 5 p.m.

Establish transitions. "You need to find a way to move mentally and socially into the next part of your life," Scot says. "For me, it's starting the chores."

Reach Anita Bruzzese c/o: Gannett ContentOne, 7950 Jones Branch Drive, McLean, VA 22107.