Dixie Grill    Step into Dixie Grill in 'Aiea and you'll spot table after table of military men (recognizable with their close-cropped hair) along with their families — not just because of the restaurant's proximity to various bases, but because this place is to homesick Southerners as a plate-lunch spot is to locals on the Mainland. Owner Ed Wary has made several Mainland trips to study different styles of true barbecue (smoked, not grilled or braised meats, served as is, with your choice of six regional sauces). Dixie Grill serves Southernstyle sweettea (that's the way it's spelled there, folks) and you can get your pulled pork with coleslaw and white bread, just like in Mississippi. They celebrate with a barbecue fest and a crab fest each year as well as other special events. Kids are always welcome; there's even a sandbox for them.  99-016 Kamehameha Highway, çAiea, 485-2722. 11 a.m.-10 p.m. Mondays-Thursdays, 11 a.m.-11 p.m. Fridays-Saturdays, 10 a.m.-10 p.m. Sundays. Brunch: 10 a.m.-2 p.m. Saturdays- Sundays. dixiegrill.com. AX, DC, DS, JCB, MC, VS. No checks. $$.  Web site: www.dixiegrill.com