Psychics predict season's TV hits
By LYNN ELBER
Associated Press
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LOS ANGELES — TV experts have tracked, stacked and analyzed Internet buzz about the new fall network series, issuing impressive-sounding reports on potential winners and losers.
One company's approach, the "PropheSEE Fan Engagement Index," involves a "propriety metric that combines online discussion" about shows and stars to rank the most-anticipated newcomers (for Martha Stewart and Chris Rock, it's a good thing).
Another firm "employs a proprietary media-mining software solution that culls through literally millions of online discussions by TV enthusiasts." Whew! That's all way too technical for me. Unlike corporations that rely on such studies to guide multimillion-dollar ad buys, I just want to know, now, if viewers are ready for Geena Davis as the first woman president or the comeback of Henry "The Fonz" Winkler.
So I made the logical move. I turned to telephone psychics using good old-fashioned tools, like tarot cards and clairvoyance, in place of the Internet.
I started tossing titles and stars at Suzzan Brigitte of Nielsen's Witches of Salem, a Los Angeles phone psychic. The new season seemed like a candidate for paranormal assessment, with the hit "Lost" leading TV into a dark thicket of shows about ghosts, monsters and such.