Being a father changes a man. You find yourself making sacrifices that were previously unthinkable.

I remember being a finicky eater as a kid. I liked my eggs over easy with the yolks runny and the whites firm. Mom was a good cook, and most the time they came out perfect, but every once in a while I would get some runny whites. Fearing my mother's wrath, I buried my head in my plate and slurped up every drop. Sometimes my dad would take pity on me, and we would swap breakfasts.

I would like to tell you that I admired the selfless gesture, but the truth is, I didn't get it. Why would someone trade perfectly good eggs for ones that run?

Some 30 years later, I get it.

I now trade my eggs, give up my TV time and even help with her chores. Yes, I am changed man.

Even the holidays are different. I serve everyone else first at Thanksgiving, make sure that my daughter gets the lion's share of the gifts for Christmas, and stock up on fireworks for the New Year.

Yes, I am a better man ... except for Halloween.

I have gone through four distinct phases when it comes to this most unholy day.

ALL ABOUT THE BOOTY

As a child, I lived for the candy. The costumes were cool, but I knew it was just a prop. It was always about the booty. In fact, my favorite Halloween was in 1978. The island was drenched by the worst storm of the season, and the mayor of Honolulu "postponed" Halloween for a day to let the weather clear. Dressed as pirates, my best friend and I decided to make a go of it. We went house to house and rang every doorbell. Whether out of pity, impressed with our courage or fearing our plastic swords, every family opened their coffers for the pirate's cause. We made a killing. Of course, the next night we went out again for more pillage and plunder.

STILL ABOUT THE BOOTY

As a young adult, Halloween was all about the party and more importantly, about girls. Truth is, I quickly got over Halloween candy, but Halloween parties were a great place to meet the ladies. For a scrawny kid like me, assuming an alter ego was like entering a phone booth as Clark Kent and exiting as Superman. Sadly, most of the girls thought I was Fearless Fly.

FOR THE KEIKI

After a 10-year moratorium, Halloween was fun again. I remember my wife and daughter in matching pumpkin outfits as we strolled along the hills of upper Wahiawa, trick-or-treating with our good friends. They too had an infant in stroller, and my buddy and I walked side by side, chest puffed out proud like only new fathers can manage.

PRAYING FOR RAIN

I have now been trick-or-treating in one form or another for more than 35 years, and I am tired. As we drove over the Pali this year, the rain came down, and my daughter said a prayer for clear skies and a fun-filled night. I prayed for more rain, hoping the mayor would cancel Halloween. Then I remembered 1978 and took it all back. The last thing I wanted to do was trail my daughter through a tempest, but I knew that if she asked, I would go. It was the right thing to do. Yes, I am a changed man, and I am still looking out for No. 1, only it is not me anymore; it is her.

Michael C. DeMattos is a member of the faculty at the University of Hawai'i School of Social Work. Born and raised on the Wai'anae Coast, he now lives in Kane'ohe with his wife, daughter, two dogs and two mice.