They say that what does not break us makes us stronger. They also say that God would not give us anything that we cannot handle. I have always wondered who "they" are and if "they" have ever faced real life day-to-day challenges.

The truth is that life can be overwhelming. They say not to sweat the small stuff and to remember that it is all small stuff. More often than not, though, it is the "little things" that pile up and grind us down. We try our best to cope and normally we do just that. We make it through; changed for good, though not always for the better.

A few weeks ago, I went from happy-go-lucky to home appliance nightmare over the course of a weekend. It started late Friday night when my wife told me that the stove tripped the circuit. I went outside, flipped the breaker switch and my wife continued with dinner. It happened again on Saturday and then the stove finally conked out on Sunday morning. Adding insult to injury, the dryer died on Sunday afternoon. My appliances were dropping like flies and my head was spinning. What next? Later Sunday evening, I went into the home office and the lights failed to completely power up. I could not believe this was happening. I was in the Twilight Zone and knew in the instant that my power source was failing.

The good news, of course, was that I did not need to buy new appliances. The bad news was that I had a problem larger than my skill set. This is the formula for a crisis; whether it be one big event too large to handle or a million little things that overwhelm us.

It was then that I tried to throw my party. This was not your typical bash with pointy hats, noisemakers and champagne. No, this was a pity party and I was looking for some guests.

My wife joined right away.

"Why does it always happen at once?" I asked.

"Just when things are going good, life throws you a curve ball," she responded.

"We live good lives; we do the right thing," I implored.

Three cliches was all it took and my daughter had enough. She made it clear that she would not be attending the pity party and that we, her parents, were off our rockers.

"Oh Dad," she said, "this isn't about you, Mom or the family. This is just an old house and it needs some help."

As it turned out, our problem was not the stove, the dryer or a light fixture. It was life, in all its mundane glory, and it took the voice of a child to rescue me from myself.

I gave my daughter a big hug, called my friend the electrician, who had me scan my incoming power lines for corrosion or fissures. It did not take long to find the problem and soon, I was on the phone to HECO.

An hour later, the problem was resolved.

Sometimes, making it through the "little" crises takes everything we've got.

In my case, it took a knowledgeable friend, a skilled technician and a child who calls 'em like she sees 'em.

They say we don't ever have to go it alone. Now I understand who they are. "They" are our loved ones; friends and family who are there when life gets the better of us.

Michael C. DeMattos is a member of the faculty at the University of Hawai'i School of Social Work. Born and raised on the Wai'anae Coast, he now lives in Kane'ohe with his wife, daughter, two dogs and two mice.